Setting Ourselves Up for Failure

Doesn't that seem like what we are doing with New Year's Resolutions? How long do those things usually last, anyway?


Let me tell you about mine from last year and how I did. You can see the full post of resolutions HERE if you are interested.


Not wearing a ponytail or sweats unless I'm heading for the gym: OMG. But it's just so easy. Plus, yoga pants rock. FAIL.


All of us out of pajamas every day by 9am. Hmmm, well, I'll go with only partial fail here. Because my oldest is now in kindergarten and has to go to school 5 days a week and my middle goes 3 days a week, this one does usually happen. I've only taken them to school in my pajamas....um...a few times. And this week doesn't count because we're on winter break. So, it's totally okay that I'm writing this at almost 4pm and I'm still in pajamas, right?


Avoiding massive amounts of butter and losing 10 pounds. But, I LOVE butter. Though, I didn't do too badly with this one until the holiday season, when everything is better with butter. Have I lost ten pounds? Nope. I don't think so. I hate getting on the scale. But, I think I'm doing okay.


Read one book a week for a total of 52 books this year. Really, this one shouldn't be hard. I used to read a few books every week- even with having kids. But, it's harder with blogging. Wonder how many blog posts I have to read to count as a book? I did read 55 books this year, so hey, I feel pretty darn good about this one.


My resolutions for 2011:

1. We will be a diaper-free household before 2012. Before the year is up, there will be no more little boys in diapers in this house.  Only Cub left to potty-train and we have the extra incentive of preschool starting in September.


2. Read 52 books this year. Okay, so I'm recycling this one. But, I don't ever want to give up books, not even for blog reading. Even if I'm now obsessed with the Kindle, like I swore I never would be.


3. Go to the gym on a regular basis.  I'm really not sure what "regular" basis means, other than that when someone asks me when the last time was that I went, I shouldn't have to stutter trying to come up with the answer or answer in terms of months.


4. Have a once a month date with the Hubs. I'd love to say once a week, but I'm trying to be realistic. We need a babysitter for these dates.  And it's still better than what we did in 2010. Though, we did have a lot of date nights in, after the kids were asleep. There's a reason our kids go to bed at 6:30, y'all.


That's it. Four is enough. Five or ten are usually good for lists, but damn, I want to have a chance at actually keeping these resolutions. Though, I could cheat and make #5 be something like "Go to Blissdom."


What about you? How did you do with last year's resolutions? What are your resolutions for the coming year?

Resolutions, Smezalutions and a Little Bit of Silly

We're at the end of the first month of the new year.

How are your resolutions coming along? Thrown them out the window yet?

You can read mine here.


Okay, okay, I know, you don't want to go back and read an old post and then read this one, too, so I'll briefly sum them up for you before I tell you how much I'm sucking at them how I'm doing.


The Ponytail Paradigm and Sweatpants Sublimation: if I'm not on my way to the gym, then no ponytail or sweatpants outside of the house.

Results so far: Well, my hair is now much shorter and I think that when I put it in a ponytail, it actually doesn't look messy, though I have been styling it more. As for the sweatpants...um, well, I've been doing good with that one, as long as you don't count that I have fallen in love with Old Navy's yoga pants and would live in those if I could. But, again, they somehow seem more put together. I'm probably totally kidding myself here, but I'm going with the thought that I look casual, but NOT like a slob.

Jammies Juxtaposition: all of us out of jammies by 9am.

Results so far: Bwwwaaaahahahahaha! Why not be lazy and stay in our jammies if we aren't going somewhere? Though, I've been changing into my yoga gear pretty early. Because it's a million degrees in my bedroom and I only sleep in a tank and underwear so I have to put something on. Because I want to seem like I'm ready for the day.



Bookworm Effect: To read 52 books this year, 1 per week. Last year, I read 99, but with all the blog reading I do now, I thought I'd cut down on my expectations.





Results so far: I'm currently on book #6 and will probably finish it today. Woohoo! I'm actually doing good with this one. If you are on Goodreads, please click over on my Goodreads widget and add me as a friend! I love seeing what other people are reading.



The Butter Postulate: Despite my love of butter, to use less of it. No recipes with one or two sticks of butter allowed.

Results so far: Well, I haven't made my sweet potato casserole since Christmas, at least. And I have actually been making healthier meals. I miss butter so much.

Ass Conjecture: After gaining 10 pounds in two months, I said I was going to lose that weight by July and then reassess.

Results so far: I haven't stepped on a scale this month. But, I can tell you that an upside of gaining weight is that my boobs are coming back. I actually had cleavage the other day, without the help of a padded push-up bra. But, we're joining a gym in February. It's going to be hard for me to actually work-out, though. You can drop off your kids in their childcare for FOUR HOURS at a time and they do not require you to stay in the gym during this time. It's going to be hard not to drop off my boys and then go home(less than 10 minutes away) and nap shower without interruption blog read clean up the house. But, I figure, I'm making progress even if I just work out for 30 minutes, go home for a little while, and then go pick up my kids. They have a preschool program during that time for the kids, so hey, they're learning.

How are yours going so far? Come on, make me feel better.



Here's my little bit of silly for the week, linking up with Stephanie from The Blue Zoo for Silly Sundays.

This video is Monkey(who dressed himself), Bear(shockingly in just underwear, right?), and Cub. They were running around and around forever(I edited that part out- I figure 1 minute or less is good for a video on here) and then Monkey decided to beat up Bear(this isn't the silly part...)

Make an on-line slide show at www.OneTrueMedia.com

After watching it, Hubs: Monkey, did you hurt your brother?

Monkey: No.

Hubs: I have it right here on tape.

Monkey: You have the wrong tape.

Inspired by the Big Bang Theory

I give you my resolutions for 2010(if you don't watch The Big Bang Theory, you will just think that I'm a total dork with my titles....but I am one, so that's okay)


The Ponytail Paradigm: Unless I am actually on my way to or from the gym, I am NOT to wear a ponytail outside of the house. My hair does not look fabulous when I try to rock a pony. This rule is in conjunction with:



The Sweatpants Sublimation: same rules- no gym, no sweatpants outside of the house.



Are you beginning to wonder how many times I will now leave the house with the intention of going to the gym and then not actually get there? You know me so well.



Jammies Juxtaposition: Self and boys will be out of jammies every day by 9am. No lounging in jammies just because we aren't going anywhere on a particular day. *Sweats are allowed here, as long as I am not leaving the house.


Bookworm Effect: 52 books this year. 1 a week, totally doable.


Butter Postulate: I love butter. When that line came in the movie Julie and Julia: "Is there anything better than butter? Think it over, any time you taste something that's delicious beyond imagining and you say 'what's in this?' the answer is always going to be butter. The day there is a meteorite rushing toward Earth and we have thirty days to live, I am going to spend it eating butter. Here is my final word on the subject: you can never have too much butter.": Well,I cheered, LOUDLY. Luckily, I was watching it in the privacy of my own home and not in the theater- though I doubt that would have stopped me. BUTter, I'm going to rethink recipes that call for a stick or more of butter due to the following:


Ass Conjecture: that's right, my ass is growing(see my love of butter, above). I've gained TEN pounds in the past two months. My goal is to lose ten pounds by July and then reassess.



*All resolutions are null and void on days when Shell or one or more of her children, including Hubs, is sick. Holidays are also excluded from enforcement. And if Shell should become pregnant, despite Hubs' snipping, all bets are off.

But, wish me luck!

In case you are wondering about my track record with resolutions, here are my two from last year and how I did with those:


#1- To STOP some of my volunteer work. I know this sounds really odd to most of you, but I did A LOT. And it sucked me dry and left nothing for the rest of my life. Particularly running the moms' group for my church. Fucking exhausting. Yes, the person who ran the moms' ministry says "fucking exhausting." You'd understand if you were there. Or maybe you wouldn't- the meetings always seemed to run effortlessly, thanks to the insane amount of work I put into them. I did cut back and I'm much saner because of it.



#2- To read 104 book in a year(2 per week). I actually had 91 read by the end of October. Then, we moved and I didn't get a library card(I'm cheap, people!) and I got sucked into the world of reading all your blogs instead. So, I ended the year with a whopping total of 99. Close, but didn't make it.