Ooooooh, Baby- That Feels GOOD!
THANK YOU TO ALL OF YOU WHO JOINED ME FOR THE TWITTER CHAT/PARTY THIS MORNING! YOU ROCK!!!! Just a brief announcement before I get to today's post: what are you doing this morning from 10:30-11:30am EST? Please join me for a twitter chat! I'm not hosting, but I'm the featured blogger and came up with the topics. If you've never tried a twitter party, this would be a great one to start with because it won't have the insane pace of the larger ones. All you have to do is go HERE at 10:30am. You can join in for any or all of the hour long chat. PLEASE JOIN ME!
Last Wednesday night, Hubs and I were spending quality time together in the living room together- he was on the couch, snoring away, while I was on the loveseat, watching SYTYCD and reading blogs. So You Think You Can Dance for those of you who haven't discovered the wonder that is Pasha. *DROOL*.
All of a sudden, I felt this pain on the back of my leg. Like something was biting me and trying to bite its way into my skin and find a way to live inside my thigh.
I screamed, jumped up, tore my shorts off, and swiped furiously at the back of my leg. Hubs kept right on snoring. Once he reaches that deep level of sleep, there is no waking him.
I was dancing around the living room, without any of the grace of the dancers on the tv screen in front of me, hoping that this was not some sort of alien killer bug that was going to paralyze me with pain and then take over my brain.
Sound insane? I know, I know, but it hurt really badly and I couldn't actually see what was going on back there.
Turns out it was a spider bite. I'd take a picture and show you the huge, swollen nasty thing that has been left behind on my leg....but, well, it is really gross. And, while it's in an area that you would be able to see if I had on my bathing suit, I would definitely give you the evil eye if I saw you staring at that particular part of my body. So, just take my word for it, okay?
What does this have to do with my post title? Well, it made me think of another spider bite that I got back when Hubs and I first met.
That one was on the front of my leg, sort of down near my knee. That time, the whole area near the bite turned very hard and a weird blue-ish color.
That one didn't hurt as much as this one did, but OMG, did it itch.
And I was told by my roommate/NC Mama that I was NOT to itch it.
But, I could see it and it taunted me- itch me, itch me, you know you'd feel better if you just itched me.
I actually managed to do pretty good with this, even though I really wanted to scratch it. Soooo badly. Though, mainly, this was only because someone would stop me. Either my NC Mama or her son(my baby bro), or even my students.
So, I thought: Oh, wait, I know: I won't itch it, but I'll take a shower....and that part of my leg must be really dirty...I better clean it really well to make sure that there isn't some sort of leftover spider toxic venom that will turn me into Spiderwoman or something.
So, oh, wonderful scrubby puff....come to mama.
NC mama and baby bro were on the other side of the house, so I took my time with my shower and "cleaning" my spider bite.
I really got into it....and it felt sooooooo good. Good enough that I was, well, moaninga bit like I was auditioning for an adult film. Totally involuntary reaction.
But, all of a sudden, the bathroom door opened, Hubs/then-guy-that-I-was-just-hanging-out-with-and-not-even-dating-but-who-would-just-drop-by-the-house-so-that-I-couldn't-tell-him-I-was-busy-if-he-called-first poked his head in and said, "Wow, can I join in?"
I instantly blushed bright red and started screaming at him to get out, get out, get out!
Completely mortified. Because I realized what I must have sounded like.
Hubs still likes to bring up that story now, almost nine years later, like it's funny or something. And I still blush.
But, when I got into the shower last weekend, with my wonderful little scrubby puff and cleaned my latest spider bite.....all Hubs did was yell in at me, "Stop scratching your spider bite!"
Oooooooh, Baby- that feels so good!
THANK YOU to Amber at The Mom Road for telling me last week that I could put rubbing alcohol on it to get some relief. OMG, THANK YOU.
Oh, and if you haven't check out this week's Blog Friend Feature, make sure you check out Kmama's post and her blog- links are in the sidebar!
All of a sudden, I felt this pain on the back of my leg. Like something was biting me and trying to bite its way into my skin and find a way to live inside my thigh.
I screamed, jumped up, tore my shorts off, and swiped furiously at the back of my leg. Hubs kept right on snoring. Once he reaches that deep level of sleep, there is no waking him.
I was dancing around the living room, without any of the grace of the dancers on the tv screen in front of me, hoping that this was not some sort of alien killer bug that was going to paralyze me with pain and then take over my brain.
Sound insane? I know, I know, but it hurt really badly and I couldn't actually see what was going on back there.
Turns out it was a spider bite. I'd take a picture and show you the huge, swollen nasty thing that has been left behind on my leg....but, well, it is really gross. And, while it's in an area that you would be able to see if I had on my bathing suit, I would definitely give you the evil eye if I saw you staring at that particular part of my body. So, just take my word for it, okay?
What does this have to do with my post title? Well, it made me think of another spider bite that I got back when Hubs and I first met.
That one was on the front of my leg, sort of down near my knee. That time, the whole area near the bite turned very hard and a weird blue-ish color.
That one didn't hurt as much as this one did, but OMG, did it itch.
And I was told by my roommate/NC Mama that I was NOT to itch it.
But, I could see it and it taunted me- itch me, itch me, you know you'd feel better if you just itched me.
I actually managed to do pretty good with this, even though I really wanted to scratch it. Soooo badly. Though, mainly, this was only because someone would stop me. Either my NC Mama or her son(my baby bro), or even my students.
So, I thought: Oh, wait, I know: I won't itch it, but I'll take a shower....and that part of my leg must be really dirty...I better clean it really well to make sure that there isn't some sort of leftover spider toxic venom that will turn me into Spiderwoman or something.
So, oh, wonderful scrubby puff....come to mama.
NC mama and baby bro were on the other side of the house, so I took my time with my shower and "cleaning" my spider bite.
I really got into it....and it felt sooooooo good. Good enough that I was, well, moaning
But, all of a sudden, the bathroom door opened, Hubs/then-guy-that-I-was-just-hanging-out-with-and-not-even-dating-but-who-would-just-drop-by-the-house-so-that-I-couldn't-tell-him-I-was-busy-if-he-called-first poked his head in and said, "Wow, can I join in?"
I instantly blushed bright red and started screaming at him to get out, get out, get out!
Completely mortified. Because I realized what I must have sounded like.
Hubs still likes to bring up that story now, almost nine years later, like it's funny or something. And I still blush.
But, when I got into the shower last weekend, with my wonderful little scrubby puff and cleaned my latest spider bite.....all Hubs did was yell in at me, "Stop scratching your spider bite!"
Oooooooh, Baby- that feels so good!
THANK YOU to Amber at The Mom Road for telling me last week that I could put rubbing alcohol on it to get some relief. OMG, THANK YOU.
Oh, and if you haven't check out this week's Blog Friend Feature, make sure you check out Kmama's post and her blog- links are in the sidebar!
posted by Shell at
7:00 AM
60 Comments:
*wonders if rubbing alcohol on works on spider bites*
I would of been completely embarrassed.
Ouch on the newest bite. Can't believe you can go back to the living room, it would take me a few weeks of convincing that I wouldn't get bit again.
Owww! Spider bites can be really nasty!! Hope it heals well on its own and you don't need any steroids or anything!!!
Hmmm. How did you know my daughter and I were discussing spider bites during dinner last night? She's jacked because she saw a spider and I don't like exterminators spraying poisonous chemicals in the house. Here's the thing: it's time for her to move out. If it takes spiders, then so be it.
Spider bites stink. Good tip on the rubbing alcohol. Benedryl spray is also awesome on itching stuff.
I'm going to be super paranoid about spiders for the rest of the day (probably longer!) ewwww! They can be pretty serious bites, hope it heals well and soon!
Damn. Way to just knock my original comment outta the park.
"Pics or it never happened"
Hmph.
But can I be your agent if you turn into Spider-Man this time? :)
That's the funniest story ever. Oh the visual.
LisaDay
Those scrubber puffs really come in handy for bug bites! I wonder if rubbing alcohol works for mosquito bites, too?
Now I'm going to freak out about spiders all day. Ew!
So, I'm at work reading this trying not to actually LOL because I'm supposed to be working, but someone must think I'm having convulsions as I struggle to keep the laughter inside.
Sorry about the bite, but thanks for the visual! haha
I once had a bite on my ankle that caused my whole foot to swell up so I couldn't wear a shoe. I ended up going to emergency and they put me on a IV drip for an hour at a time, 2 times a day for like 3 days! What a PITA to have to go down to emergency twice a day for the treatment.
Luckily it was over a weekend so it didn't interfere too much with life.
Haha! Glad you could get some relief in the shower :)
hahaha!
spiders are so yuck!
you would not believe the size of the big mama-jama i killed the other day... i'd have needed six scrubbies to get some relief!
btw i think it is wonderful your hubbie can still make you blush!
You are just way too funny!! Hope the bite clears up soon though...those are no fun!
I am coming to the Twitter party!
Ouch...spider bites are the worst. A few weeks ago, I had one on my butt. Next time, I will remember the shower thing.
Side note, my husband works on SUTUCD. He does the lighting. He just left the house for today's show. They have an entire day of rehearsals before the live shooting.
Thanks for sharing Shell! That was sooo funny! We can bond now... I've done the exact same thing with a rash that was on the back on my hand. It hurt to rub or scractch it but I would let it just hang out in the pounding water from the shower head and "Oh my" did that feel good. I totally know how you were feeling!
Ugh, NC has the GROSSEST spiders. But other than that, this post was hysterical!! I don't use a puff, but I have a "shower towel" made of the same material,and it's the best thing ever for bug bites!!
Hahahaha....wonder if that was the moment he knew he wanted to marry you?
I love your husband!
So funny!
Hope you've gotten relief! The only thing I've ever had that was soooo bad that I itched in ecstasy was after I had gotten stung by a jellyfish and the two weeks following when the poison was leaving my leg...boy did that scratching feel so good!
xoxox
Omg, I so have arachnophobia so I would have needed a tranquilizer to sleep after that! And there is nothing worse than having a bad itch and being told NOT to scratch it. That's like impossible!
LOL! I have eczema and sensitive skin, so I often get rashes. And yes, scrubbing them or itching them or whatever FEELS SO GOOD.
I can't believe hubs walked in right then. Hilarious.
It's funny how things change!
I had a brown recluse spider bite me when I was in the 9th grade (although I didn't realize it was a spider bite until later). It looked disgusting and the pain was excrutiating. My mom that I was being dramatic and that it was a bee sting. Eventually (after a week) she took me to the doctor. I had to have shots and there was talk of me needing to be quarantined. I felt very vidicated.
I have a scar there now from where the venom went - as well as a little indentation that I can feel where the skin "rotted." It sounds worse than it is, but it still makes me feel good knowing that I was right and my mother was wrong.
Anywho - good luck with your spider bite!
Talk with you later.
Showers puffs are wonderful for the itchies!
That is one of those embarrassing moments that turn into the funniest stories ever.
So glad that you are okay after both of those bites. Like the idea of scratching with one of those scrubbies! However, that being said, you had me laughing. Very cute story.
Sorry about your bite and its a wonder how a few years of marriage can change things.
I assume this was a witty and well written post, but to be perfectly honest you lost me after the first paragraph.
Mmmm...Pasha
Oh myword do I hate spider bites. When I get them they only hurt like freakin hell! Funny story though :o)
Oh man, that sounds mortifying... but if I'd been your husband on the other side, I would've been beside myself.
I happen to have a raging spider bite on the back of my knee right now and the only time I scratch it is when I absently brush it in the middle of the night and then tear the snot out of it in my sleep.
It's like it didn't really happen.
Scrubby poofs = heaven for itching. If I itch I will either drive myself crazy tapping (thinking of all the ladies with weaves who tap itstead of scratch) or I end up itching so much that I'm bleeding everywhere. Not cute!
HAHA! Love the comparison between how the husband was before ("can I come in?") and now ("SNOOOREEE"). I don't get how men sleep through some things. When I went in to labor with our daugther a couple months ago, he slept through some of my worst contractions even though I was squeezing him as hard as I could...I couldn't believe it!!
A twitter party? A twitter party? I don't even understand that haha.
Worst ever. I got a spider bite on the back of my EAR! I about lost my mind I was pretty sure their 'venom' was going to my brain and causeing me like some brain disorder. I went to a dermatologist who cut it and drained it and it was HELLA painful procedure but so much better afterward.
PS I LOVE Pascha but Neil is our hometown hero so I'm a bit partial.
But mostly I love anything NappyTaps does.
Oh, I've never had one. It sounds painful, itchey, and misserable!
You got a funny story out of it though, and cute :)
Ouch! That sucks! But, thanks for the tip about rubbing alcohol!
By the way, you might like my friend's blog ... www.straightguyswhowatchgayshows.com. They're just getting started, but their primary focus right now is SYTYCD!
I gave an audible gasp, put my hand over my mouth and starting laughing. That story is HYS-TER-ICAL!! Oh, Shell!! Thanks for sharing!
Now for the spider bite...I'd be freaked to sit down for a while for fear a spider was going to get me!
Lol!!!!! Ah, I needed a good laugh this morning, lol!
spider bite?! ewww, that's creepy!
:: scratch scratch scratch ::
What are you talking about? I would never do that.
:: scratch scratch scratch ::
Totally missed the twitter chat. Boo.
LOL that's a totally funny story! I loooove "cleaning" itchy insect bites in the shower. It does feel sooooo good and technically its not itching its cleaning, right?
Hope your bite gets better soon. :)
I hope it is healing - and what a very funny story by the way! I got bitten during the night by a spider when we lived in Belgium, on my nipple of all places and it got infected so badly that normal antibiotics did not work so I was on super hefty doses and in bed for a week. I had told my NY Bronx raised boss and asked him not to tell anyone else exactly where I had been bitten but sure enough when I got back to work at our next Sales Director meeting he blurted out the tale to the entire boardroom.....
I totally love the feeling of scratching an itch. It's the best. Sorry about your spider bite though!
The spiders must love us! I was bitten a few years ago and have a nasty scar on my leg.
A few weeks, well more like a month ago, I was bitten on my back. Right above my arse.
It turned black and was WAY nasty! I have a scar there now too.....
[I iched then with the poof too though!]
I both love the shower story with your husband, because that's hilarious and am frantically trying to remember where you live and never to move there because apparently it's infested with beyond creepy spiders.
Man, there is nothing like a good scratch. I think I have a spider bite on my pinkie. It's red and kinda hard and has been itching - for a couple weeks! Hmm..maybe i need a shower...
I have had those kind of bites and they are awful!!
We are all getting eaten by spiders here...what the heck! Ill have to try a puffy scrubby thing!
OMG, OMG, OMG, OMG...spider bite? You have spiders that bite where you live?
Another good reason to live where it gets really cold!
Funny story though....
Spider bites itch for days too! I hate those!
Ouch girl! Those kill. I'm glad to know about rubbing alcohol. I'm lauging about your hubby opening the door asking to join in. :)
Cute story about the shower. I would have freaked.
Cleaning the bite is not scratching it.
That is hilarious. Both the story and how far marriage takes you. In your single days, he would have jumped up to see if you were ok. And the shower thing, too perfect.
I had on this cute little nightie the other night that my sister had sent me. Back in the day, my hubs would have noticed in an instant. He walked in the room right after I'd put it on and just looked right at me and said, "have you seen my somethin' somethin' tool? I can't find it." (I have no idea about the name of tools.) So, yeah he left the room scratching his head about his stupid tool.
I'm allergic to almost every arthropod bite there is, so I feel your pain on the itchy! There is nothing better than when you get it scratch just right either.
Your hubby and mine are quite a pair they are! Sheesh!
Hey! Thanks so much for the comment! That's exactly right, it's always the young kids that post stupid things like that. Lol. But I just became a follower! I look forward to reading more! :)
well now i'm itching uncontrollably, HATE creepy crawlies on me. Next to me? I can stomp the crap out of them. On me? Yep. Itching.
Now this Big-O-Type shower you had. That's awesome. Reminds me of when i hit just the right spot with a q-tip. Makes me moan just a little.
Oh Shell, I'm laughing out loud about you moaning in the shower with your scrubby (how in the hell do you spell louffa?) !
All that spider talk is making my skin crawl. I can't figure out how to do the Twitter party. Help?
LoL!!too funny but not being bit by a spider!!hope your ok!:)
Funny, funny story...Your blog always makes me laugh..
Be sure and stop by ...I have a great giveaway this week...Have a great weekend.
Maybe *you* needed to remind *him* of that story! "Baby don't you remember when you thought this was sexy?!" ;-)
I so identify with this because when I was a kid, I got multiple spider bites on the insides of my thighs and I vividly remember taking a hairbrush and just scratching away. It felt AMAZING.
I'm with Dysfunctional Mom there is no way anyone is keeping me away from scratching that bite with the hairbrush ^_^ AHHHH!!! Boy does it very feel soooo good!
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