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Wednesday, June 22, 2011

Pour Your Heart Out: My Soft Place to Land



Welcome to Pour Your Heart Out- if you need more info on how to participate, check out THIS post. But it's personal- it's what YOU think is pouring your heart out. Please grab the PYHO button or link back in your post if you are participating.

Again, just a brief reminder that everyone linking is pouring their hearts out and we should all be respectful in our comments. ;)




 


P.S. I'm traveling today. I will visit all the linkers as usual, but it might take me a bit longer this week! Thanks for joining in. 


If you've been around these past few weeks, you know that I have been struggling with feeling overwhelmed lately. I was trying to figure out ways to deal with it.

And though I'm not completely through it, I am starting to feel better.

Through it all, I've realized something really important.

I have a soft place to land.

Someone who loves me through all my crazy.

My up and down moods, my crying jags, my pissed-off rants, my exhaustion, my crabbiness.  The times I stomp my foot like a child and loudly whine that something isn't fair. And oh, have I mentioned the crying?

But, Hubs loves me through all of it.

I know that I'm able to vent and whine and pout and cry and he'll listen to me.  He'll hold me when I need it, fix what he can, make me laugh, and make me realize that I'm never alone.

When I'm with him, I don't ever have to pretend that things are okay when they are not.

There is such peace in having someone who gets me like he does.

Yes, he was forced to wear that bright pink vest as best man at his brother's wedding last weekend. 

Marry someone who is your best friend: the advice you hear over and over again.  Someone who loves you for you. 

And I did. Still so in love with my husband: almost 10 years since we met, 8+ years of marriage, 3 kids, countless moves, and many cranky days later. 

Even when I am feeling overwhelmed, I know that I have this amazing man as my husband.  The good days, our friendship, and our love get us through it all.

A-hem: feeling the need to add- I'm not always difficult and Hubs isn't always easy. There's no good guy/bad guy here. Just a balanced marriage where we support each other...which is why our marriage works!


Labels: ,

78 Comments:

Blogger Barbara said...

What a great post! It's true, marry your best friend and the rest takes care of itself!

June 22, 2011 at 7:14 AM  
Blogger Heather said...

You are so right. My hubby supports me in everything I do even when I am CRAZY CRAZY and sometimes I don't give him enough credit for that. Sometimes I just get focused on those days when he doesn't put a dish in the diswasher or walks by the same pile of unfolded towels 10 times.
Thanks for the reminder.

June 22, 2011 at 7:14 AM  
Blogger Sorta Southern Single Mom said...

It is wonderful when you meet that person who compliments you so completely... or so I hear :)

June 22, 2011 at 7:16 AM  
Blogger Clare said...

The older I get, and the more I see other marriages crumble around me, the more I realize how rare and awesome my own is. Like you, I also married my best friend, and can relate to everything you wrote above! What a beautiful tribute to your husband! And girl? You look so pretty in that pic - hot dress! :)

June 22, 2011 at 7:19 AM  
Blogger Minivan Mama said...

Marry your best friend and make sure you treat them that way forever!

Ahhh...you gotta love, love!

June 22, 2011 at 7:24 AM  
Blogger Jessica said...

Such a sweet post. So glad you have him. I'm glad you gave the disclaimer about the pink vest, that's the only way my husband would wear pink too.

June 22, 2011 at 7:26 AM  
Anonymous Galit Breen said...

I so get this Shell! This part of our story is the same. Thank goodness for loving husbands, balance wherever we can find it, especially marriage!

Also- for cute pictures taken at weddings! Love the pink, love your dress!

June 22, 2011 at 7:29 AM  
Blogger Lisa said...

Cherish him! It took me to many years to find a man like that and I know I cherish him. :)

June 22, 2011 at 7:34 AM  
Blogger Oka said...

If we wanted to, Mike and I could nit pick each other like crazy. Things aren't all a dream. But at the end of the day, no matter how much we get on each other nerves (occasionally), we seem to be able to remember we love each other through it all.

June 22, 2011 at 7:36 AM  
Blogger Rach (DonutsMama) said...

You are very lucky and blessed that you have a husband who is your ally during these tough times. That's what I love about my husband too--no matter what, we're on the same team.

P.S. That's a great picture!

June 22, 2011 at 7:39 AM  
Blogger Dawna said...

I'm SO glad you have such a husband, Shell! I do too, and there are times - when things are at their most difficult - that he helps make life bearable. :-)

BIG HUGS to you!

June 22, 2011 at 8:11 AM  
Blogger Heather said...

Very sweet. Ya'll look great together.

June 22, 2011 at 8:13 AM  
Blogger Mommy's Paradise said...

I think if your husband is not your best friend at the same time, the marriage is not going to work. And best friends don't always have the same opinion but can come to a compromise, because they respect each other. I am so happy for you, you found your best friend.

June 22, 2011 at 8:14 AM  
Blogger Elena said...

Marrying your best friend is key! Glad you have that landing spot, Shell. I love the last line - no good guy/bad guy - it's a balanced marriage.

June 22, 2011 at 8:14 AM  
Blogger Adrienne said...

First off, I love that dress you have on! Looking beautiful, mama!

Second, I love this post!!! Having that kind of comfort to be you no matter what is so special. I'm lucky to have a great husband too! So happy you found your soft place to land. That's the perfect way to describe it.

June 22, 2011 at 8:14 AM  
Blogger Adrienne said...

AND...I did totally marry my best friend. For years we'd say, "Oh, we're just friends." HAHA! Yeah, right!

June 22, 2011 at 8:15 AM  
Blogger Kmama said...

I am so glad I married my best friend, the guy who really gets me, and supports me.

We are lucky women, aren't we?

June 22, 2011 at 8:17 AM  
Blogger amygrew said...

You are so right! You have to marry your best friend. Why would you want to marry anyone else?

Great post. Have a great trip :)

June 22, 2011 at 8:18 AM  
Blogger Tara R. said...

I was lucky enough to marry my best friend too... 25 years this month. Congrats to you and yours, and best wishes for many more wonderful years together.

June 22, 2011 at 8:35 AM  
Blogger Natalie said...

You are right...we all go through ups and downs..and that's why you do marry your best friend so they can get you through it...and still love you after you've been a total brat LOL. Glad you've got a great man by your side...and that he has a great woman by his! :)

June 22, 2011 at 8:49 AM  
Blogger vinobaby said...

It's so nice to hear someone else who has found the ying for their yang. I am with you--I can't imagine being married to someone who is not my best friend.

Cheers.

June 22, 2011 at 8:55 AM  
Blogger Jenn said...

I always say it's such a blessing to be married to somebody who loves and supports you like that. It's even more of a blessing when you realize just how good you have it. I'm glad you got a good one!

June 22, 2011 at 9:01 AM  
Blogger Kristin said...

I long for that unconditional support. You are very blessed, my friend. Love you and miss you!

June 22, 2011 at 9:08 AM  
Blogger Alison@Mama Wants This said...

You are right of course - there's nothing like knowing that no matter how hard it gets, you have someone you know you can fall back on, always.

Looking sizzling hot in that photo Shell!

Have a great trip!

June 22, 2011 at 9:08 AM  
Anonymous Megan (Best of Fates) said...

Man, I want a husband like that.

Or a pet chipmunk.

I can never decide.

(I mean, he sounds awesome, but have you seen a chipmunk? ADORable.)

June 22, 2011 at 9:10 AM  
Blogger Evonne said...

Marrying your best friend is so important. I'm glad I did, too.

Marriage isn't always easy, but being with someone who gets you and supports you makes it easier.

Enjoy your trip!

June 22, 2011 at 9:11 AM  
Blogger Erinsgobragh said...

Awesome post girl. I don't know what I'd do without my hubby!
Your man is rocken that pink!

June 22, 2011 at 9:14 AM  
Blogger Beth Zimmerman said...

This is so beautiful, Shell! I'm glad he's there for you ... and vice versa! :)

June 22, 2011 at 9:29 AM  
Blogger Julie said...

The fact that he's willing to wear that pink vest says more about your husband than a thousand words...

What a good sport.

And you two? Are beautiful together.

You took the lines right from my mouth. I married my best friend, too.

17 years together. Almost 15 years married.

It gets even better. I promise.

Cheers to love. To soft places to fall.

June 22, 2011 at 9:38 AM  
Blogger Di said...

Aren't hubbies the greatest? Mine loves me even when I'm crying, he asks me what is wrong, and I don't have an answer!

Sweet, sweet post!

June 22, 2011 at 9:40 AM  
Blogger Kir said...

first, seriously YOU LOOKED GORGEOUS, that dress is perfection!!!

then you make a wonderful couple, WOW!!!! OMG, makes me smile just looking at you both.

plus marrying someone who is your friend, who loves you for YOU....well that's the best kind of love isn't it??

one of my favorite quotes about love is "Love is Friendship set on Fire" and that's how I try to live with my guy, like our friendship is just the spark to our love.

xoxoox

June 22, 2011 at 9:50 AM  
Blogger singedwingangel said...

Beautiful pic of you 2, and hey he is rocking that pink like my son did for prom. My hubby and I were friends for 10 years before we got married.. LOOONNNNGGG story.. we have been together 16 years now.

June 22, 2011 at 9:51 AM  
Anonymous Kimberly said...

My husband is my world as well. When I'm in his arms all the problems in the world melt away. I'm so glad that yours is the same. We are pretty lucky eh. I hope that he reads this.

June 22, 2011 at 10:13 AM  
Blogger Kim @ Mamas Monologues said...

You are absolutely right, marry someone who is your best friend. My husband is my rock. I lean on him for everything, but at the same time he leans on me too. It's definitely a balance and a give and take.

Glad you found such a wonderful man. Also, love that picture!

June 22, 2011 at 10:47 AM  
Blogger Renegades said...

I've also been blessed to marry my best friend. It is so nice to have love and support when you need it most. It also helps to have a strong hand to hold.

June 22, 2011 at 10:53 AM  
Blogger Erica@PLRH said...

I can totally relate to this post. My hubby has been my anchor and my soft place to land during the past 18 months.

I'm so glad you married your best friend. I know I did.

June 22, 2011 at 10:55 AM  
Blogger Tammy said...

I so agree. I found my guy at 18 but didn't marry him until I was 32...many years and heartbreaks later as we didn't know we were suppose to be together back then. It sure does help to have the person who understands AND SUPPORTS us in the best and worst of times! :)

Have fun at Type A!

June 22, 2011 at 10:59 AM  
Blogger Karen Mortensen said...

Sounds like a keeper to me. That is so wonderful that the two of you support each other like that.

June 22, 2011 at 11:05 AM  
Blogger Deb said...

So glad you are starting to feel better. Having someone one who accepts you for "you" is so important!!!

June 22, 2011 at 11:08 AM  
Blogger Jessica said...

This makes my heart so happy for you. There is nothing better than loving your best friend!

Have fun this week! xoxo

June 22, 2011 at 11:10 AM  
Blogger beenomom said...

You are so right. I've been married almost 11 years and to this day I still consider my hubs to be my best friend in the whole wide world! He keeps me together when I feel like Im gonna lose my mind! On a side note, I'm really glad to hear that you are starting to feel better and not so overwhelmed all the time!

June 22, 2011 at 11:14 AM  
Blogger Courtney K. said...

What a great tribute to your husband, and a testament to the kind of marriage you guys have. Marriage isn't easy, and neither person is ever perfect. But it's so nice to know that when things are at their worst, you have someone to fall back on. Enjoy your time away!

June 22, 2011 at 11:30 AM  
Blogger KSK said...

I'm so glad I married my best friend too! I love this post :) I'm glad you're getting through it!

June 22, 2011 at 11:39 AM  
Blogger Lisa @ Two Bears Farm said...

How awesome! Sounds like you have a great relationship.

June 22, 2011 at 11:42 AM  
Blogger Kristina P. said...

I really got lucky in the marriage department. We don't have a perfect relationship, but my husband is a genuinely kind man.

June 22, 2011 at 12:06 PM  
Blogger Renee said...

Yay! So glad you are starting to feel better. Marriage is a blessing, especially when you are married to your best friend.

June 22, 2011 at 12:27 PM  
Blogger Hope said...

Sounds like a wonderful dynamic between you and your husband. Thanks for sharing.

P.S. He is absolutely right to wear pink. Pink was considered too strong for girls and restricted to boys until the 1940s (some sources say because it is a faded version of the red on Roman warriors). Girls were supposed to wear blue - calm, passive like women are...yikes.

June 22, 2011 at 1:08 PM  
Blogger Jen said...

You guys look so nice! Glad you have your "soft place to land". And glad you're feeling back to normal. XO

June 22, 2011 at 1:22 PM  
Blogger Jessica said...

My husband is also my best friend and it's great. I don't know what I would do without him.

June 22, 2011 at 2:12 PM  
Blogger Brittney said...

its so comforting having someone like that in your life. Someone to laugh with cry with and just totally be yourself with!

June 22, 2011 at 2:22 PM  
Blogger Heather H said...

What a great testament to your relationship! Very sweet and thanks for sharing!

June 22, 2011 at 2:27 PM  
Blogger Grumpy Grateful Mom said...

Great post! I'm so glad you have good guy. I think that can make such a huge difference.

June 22, 2011 at 2:33 PM  
Blogger Hutch said...

Awww love to hear about the good guys out there, even if they are taken. Gives me faith! Glad you found your best friend :)

June 22, 2011 at 2:59 PM  
Blogger The Riggs Family said...

What a great post! Sounds like you've got a great man! :-) A balanced marriage is a healthy marriage.

June 22, 2011 at 3:23 PM  
Blogger A Mommy in the City said...

So cute!!! Love this post.

June 22, 2011 at 3:46 PM  
Blogger Angie said...

It is very important to marry someone who you can land on! I am glad he is being a great support system to you right now. ((hugs)) I've been thinking about you a lot lately.

June 22, 2011 at 4:16 PM  
Blogger Sarah said...

Having an amazing man in your life makes up for many other things that go wrong!!! I'm so glad that you have that!!! Beautiful picture!!!! :)

June 22, 2011 at 5:09 PM  
Blogger Emmy said...

Yes- too many people seem to marry for the thrill, the attraction, etc... but those things wane over time- it is the friendship, the being on the same team and wanting to better each other which really makes a relationship work. Glad he is there for you

June 22, 2011 at 5:31 PM  
Blogger Just Jennifer said...

"Lucky I'm in love with my best friend..."

My husband is my very best friend too. We compliment each other's personalities and we're a great team. Communication and courtesy are key!

June 22, 2011 at 7:26 PM  
Blogger Helene said...

You make such a great point about marrying your best friend...someone who loves you for you!

So happy you have a soft place to land...it's very comforting and you deserve someone as special as he is!

Love the pic of you two!!!!

June 22, 2011 at 7:28 PM  
Blogger Hyacynth said...

Such solid, wonderful advice, Shell: marry your best friend. Yes -- to that! And to many more years of your marriage. :)

June 22, 2011 at 8:07 PM  
Blogger Babes Mami said...

I married the nice good guy and it has worked out wonderfully. We balance each other out too, if we didn't it wouldn't work this easily compared to many other marriages.

June 22, 2011 at 8:38 PM  
Blogger The Random Blogette said...

I am so with you Shell. Sometimes people see my sarcastic ass of a husband and wonder how I can put up with it, but what they don't know is that he is not like that with me. He is my rock and my best friend. No matter what he is always there, even when I am at my most ridiculous.

And by the way, you look GORGEOUS in that picture! Hot momma for sure! And your hubs totally pulls off the pink vest and tie!

June 22, 2011 at 9:30 PM  
Anonymous molly said...

I'm sorry you're feeling overwhelmed. I have suffered with depression for all of my adult life and loving me is definitely not easy. But my husband loves me unconditionally. It is so nice to have a soft place to land.

I am going to participate in PYHO for the first time. Thanks for hosting!

June 22, 2011 at 9:36 PM  
Blogger Jill said...

Glad you found a good man Shell. I feel the same and know how lucky I am (usually)

June 22, 2011 at 9:38 PM  
Blogger Janie {Hoo} said...

It's always comforting to know that you have someone to hold your hand through good times and especially tough times. You're blessed to have a great husband and friend by your side, but he's even luckier to have you as her wife! Safe travels!

June 22, 2011 at 10:07 PM  
Blogger Mama Zen said...

That soft place to land is priceless!

June 22, 2011 at 10:25 PM  
Blogger Rebecca Watson said...

:) thanks for the great idea. I love the fact you wrote about your husband! That is so adorable. I should post more about my sweet hubby- since he is one of my daily readers! He'd be surpised to see a post about him! :)

June 22, 2011 at 10:40 PM  
Blogger Kelley said...

That is so sweet!! I know what you mean about the peace you feel with your husband. It is a blessing, no doubt. I'm glad you have a soft place to land. :)

June 22, 2011 at 10:55 PM  
Blogger Heidi said...

That is so sweet!

June 22, 2011 at 11:22 PM  
Blogger Sherri said...

Shell, what a beautiful tribute to your hubs! And that picture of the two of you is awesome!

June 22, 2011 at 11:38 PM  
Blogger Annie @ astonesthrowfrominsanity said...

It is such a comfort to feel safe in the love of your hub. :) I wrote about that too this week, although not quite as eloquently as you. :)

June 23, 2011 at 8:03 AM  
Blogger Marcia (123 blog) said...

You are so right. I'm having the crappiest day and all I want to do is just be with my soft place to land - my hubby :)

Thanks, Shell, and hopefully you get out of that overwhelm soon

June 23, 2011 at 12:08 PM  
Blogger Jennifer said...

I so totally get this. Having been out of town for work I feel like I've been set adrift without my anchor to pull me back down. I hate it and I'm so ready to go home.

June 23, 2011 at 12:46 PM  
Blogger Charlotte said...

*SIGH*

Hearing this leaves me with some shred of hope that there are good men left out there (even though sometimes I wonder where they are hiding, LOL!). It's refreshing to see couples who truly support one another and I'm so happy you have this with your hubs :) You are a beautiful, sweet couple. This photo alone is clear indication of that. XOXO

June 23, 2011 at 1:03 PM  
Blogger michellespann said...

What a great post! :) And great picture too - you both look FAB! :)

June 23, 2011 at 2:18 PM  
Blogger Jen Has A Pen said...

I grew up around so much divorce and bitterness that cynical marriages were my normal. My marriage is not like this in any way, and my normal is changing to realize that most of the people I know now are married to their spouses because they really and truly like them. Before, I thought that percentage was so small. I think that's why I didn't want to get married (until I met George).
It's so nice to hear that you have such a fantastic relationship with your husband. Having the security of a soft place to fall is massively important. Makes me smile just thinking of it. :-)

June 25, 2011 at 9:40 AM  
Blogger Lady Jennie said...

Sweet post and sweet picture!

June 26, 2011 at 11:59 AM  

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