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Wednesday, February 24, 2010

A Completely Different Child

Just a few months ago, my little Bear....

Oh, my Bear.

He has always been such a sweet little boy.

But, he really struggled.

Developmental delays.

Sensory Processing Disorder.

Speech delays.

Even the big "A" word was tossed around.

All as a result of an illness that he had.

No one could tell us if the effects would go away as his body healed or if there would be permanent neurological damage. Just typing those three words makes me want to throw up.

I tried my best to hold it together during the day, but I would go into his room when he was sleeping, run my fingers through his hair, and pray for God to heal him. And cry. Wanting him to be "normal." Wanting everyone to be able to see the sweet little boy that he is.

Bear, on his first day of 3 year-old preschool.

He would try to express himself, get frustrated that he couldn't, and sometimes bite someone.

Or scream.

He'd try to tell us things, but couldn't really string many words together. Unless he was singing. It's the reason I tolerate the weirdness of Yo Gabba Gabba. Their songs helped us communicate with our son.

He'd cover his ears and leave the room if things were loud.

You could call for him and it was like he couldn't even hear you.

And not in the same way that my other boys might choose to ignore me.

He really couldn't hear me.

Getting him to do simple things like sit down or walk with his classmates in a line were impossible for him.

He wasn't trying to be difficult or defiant.

It was just beyond him to be able to do those things.

Even trying to get him to cooperate enough to be able to be evaluated by the early childhood interventionists was near impossible. They weren't sure what to do with him, since they couldn't really tell us any results that they considered valid. So, all they would suggest is that we retest him in a few months. Over and over again.

But, oh, how he's changed.

We all understand him now.

He speaks in long sentences.

He answers when you ask him a question.

Sometimes he says or does things that his older brother would get in trouble for, but we laugh and hug him. Excited that he CAN say these things.

He is able to sit and participate with his classmates.

He can hear you when you call for him.

Sometimes he might choose not to actually do what you tell him to, but it's a choice, not an inability to process what you are asking him to do.

He still has some struggles, but he is healing.

It's like he is a completely different child from who he was just a few months ago.

Bear, on the day of his preschool Valentine's Day party

I'm typing this with tears in my eyes.

He went through another early childhood intervention screening recently. I watched from another part of the room as he sat at the different stations, following directions and talking to the evaluators. We only hit one small bump, because they had over-scheduled the evaluations and at one point, he had to play for about a half an hour before moving to the final station. By that point, he was tired and wanting to play and didn't cooperate.

But, that was only one small segment. And I think it's even understandable for any three year-old.

The results of that screening told the team that he did not need to come back to undergo the full screening. Not unless I, as the parent, had additional concerns.

Because I like to be on the safe side and I'd rather he get additional help now if he needs it, and because his score was not much above their cut-off point for needing to have further evaluations done, I did tell the team that I wanted to bring him back for the full evaluation. That is where we are headed this afternoon.

I still worry about him. I don't know if I'll ever stop.

But, I know now that he is getting better. And pray that in time, there will be no lasting effects from his illness.

What a blessing.





Click HERE for other people who have to tell you the story behind their pictures.

Labels: ,

98 Comments:

Anonymous Anonymous said...

He's such a beautiful boy, Shell! I am so glad to hear he's doing so well.

February 24, 2010 at 6:57 AM  
Blogger Oka said...

God's grace is amazing...

Way to fight Bear. Way to Love Mom!

February 24, 2010 at 6:59 AM  
Blogger Missy | Literal Mom said...

That's great news. I hope he continues to improve. I understand the importance of early intervention, but I have to admit, sometimes I think pre-school teachers jump the gun on "disorders" in the young. Good luck!

February 24, 2010 at 7:08 AM  
Blogger WNY Kitchen and Bath said...

He is so adorable! I am so happy that he is making improvements. That is great!

You are a great mom and I am sure your love and encouragement has a lot to do with his improvements.

February 24, 2010 at 7:23 AM  
Blogger Rebecca said...

What a story! One that so many Moms can relate to. So glad to hear that things are working themselves out, but I'm sure that your determination and love helped things along too. The music is huge (in my opinion) and sounds like it did wonders for his communication (as annoying as Yo Gabba Gabba is). Keep up the great work!!!

February 24, 2010 at 7:25 AM  
Blogger FRANNIE said...

Stopping By from SITS but I had to say that you've described my oldest nephew exactly.

He had such difficulty when he was 3 doing the most basic of things, he had all the tests, early intervention pre-school, my SIL quit her job to be at home and work with him constantly. They thought it would never get better, they were deathly afraid that it would be permenent.

He's now 5 and the change has been nothing if not miraculous.

My brother said he actually cried at Family Game Night at school when my nephew waited in the line with the other kids until it was his turn for something. Such a small thing for the other kids but huge for him.

It seems like the road is never ending but it will get better. Good Luck.

February 24, 2010 at 7:28 AM  
Blogger Meg @ Higgins Happenings said...

Thats awesome news! I'm really happy to hear that Bear's doing better! He is truly an adorable kid & I hope & pray for nothing less than the best for him! He sounds like everythings getting better - it's amazing what a little prayer & hope can do! I'm really happy for you & for bear!!
<3

February 24, 2010 at 7:31 AM  
Blogger Unknown said...

I am so glad he is becoming okay again.. as a mother to a bipolar child who was misdiagnosed for years I can understand the fear and frustration as your child cannot begin to communicate what they are feeling... so glad BEar is okay and he is a doll baby..

February 24, 2010 at 7:32 AM  
Blogger Ginny Marie said...

I'm so glad Bear has improved so much! It's wonderful that as a teacher you know early intervention is so important, and you're not sticking your head in the sand like some parents do when their child has a developmental problem. I think with you as a mom, Bear will only continue to improve!

February 24, 2010 at 7:39 AM  
Blogger Rachel said...

I don't have children yet, but my biggest fear when I DO have them is the "A" word. I'm so happy that your child is doing better!

Go see the new home for your button! Thanks for letting me know.. although your button is the only one working for now lol. I tried to get the SITS button, and all that did was give me a red X. So I will try again later :)

February 24, 2010 at 7:48 AM  
Blogger Stepping On Cheerios said...

Shell, he is so handsome. I am so glad to hear how he's turned things around. I have my own concerns with Muffin, going through his 2nd eval this coming Monday.

Good luck to you and Bear today. Hope to hear how it goes:)

February 24, 2010 at 7:49 AM  
Blogger Elizabeth Patch said...

thanks for stopping by my blog and helping make my SITS day so wonderful. I hope your beautiful boy continues to grow to his full potential!

February 24, 2010 at 7:52 AM  
Blogger MommyLisa said...

Aren't prayer and love magical things!

A BIG WARM HUG to you from MN.

L

February 24, 2010 at 8:03 AM  
Blogger Unknown said...

Shell...I think I was in tears with the first few sentences of this post! That was without even knowing what it was going to be about. Your Bear is adorable!! And having 3 kids myself, one with ADD...it's tough! And scary!! I'm so glad he's moving along in the right direction :)

February 24, 2010 at 8:03 AM  
Blogger Adoption of Jane said...

THANK GOD!!! So glad the big "A" hasn't hit you!! Congrats on going through everything necessary to find out whats going on. So many mothers just say... oh well he will talk on his own time.. blah blah blah, but early intervention is so important! Good Job Shell!! Nice dodge of the A bullet too! WHEW!!!

P.S. I am in Love with the MotherBitches Button!!! I forgot you emailed me about it... just saw it and its on my (underconstruction) Blog!! Woot Woot!!

February 24, 2010 at 8:11 AM  
Anonymous Anonymous said...

I'm so happy to hear that he's doing better! He is so adorably cute! I hope he continues his progress. He's lucky to have such a great mom too!

February 24, 2010 at 8:31 AM  
Blogger Sassy Salsa girl said...

I don't think we ever stop worrying about our children.
I'm so glad to hear he is doing so well, that is awesome!
What an amazing kid!

February 24, 2010 at 8:35 AM  
Blogger Kmama said...

He is such a cutie pie!!

I'm sitting here with tears in my eyes too.

I know exactly how it feels when you don't know what a diagnosis will mean for your child. The fear and anxiety that you go through. And for me, the depression and sadness as you try to sort it all out in your mind.

I am so glad that he's doing so well. Good luck today!!

February 24, 2010 at 8:44 AM  
Blogger Andrea said...

Glad to hear your little Bear is doing better.

February 24, 2010 at 8:50 AM  
Blogger Evonne said...

I have tears in my eyes from reading this. That is so great that he is doing better! I hope his progress continues.

February 24, 2010 at 8:50 AM  
Anonymous Anonymous said...

Oh, how I love Bear!!!! He really is such a sweet little guy! I miss him a lot!

Good luck today! Praying for good news!

(I can't believe how grown up he has gotten in the past 5 mo!)

February 24, 2010 at 8:53 AM  
Anonymous Anonymous said...

So glad to hear that he is making strides with his development. My monkey is just 1 and during my pregnancy and now I worry, I worry a lot. I am a teacher, I see it all, and I used to work closely with toddlers with Autism. It's worrisome. Best of Luck and best of luck on a continued path to recovery.
Lucy

February 24, 2010 at 8:57 AM  
Blogger a49erfangirl said...

I hope today goes well with the evaluations. It's the strides that the kids make that make us think of the positive side :)

February 24, 2010 at 9:21 AM  
Blogger Mama (Heidi) said...

Such a handsome little guy.

What great stride he has made, I hope today's evaluations can give you more answers than questions.

February 24, 2010 at 9:26 AM  
Blogger Sugar Bear said...

Moms never stop worrying...at least this is what I hear when I wonder aloud the same thing...does the worry every stop?

Probably not.

I hope today at least puts some worrying to rest.

before there's something else to worry about.

;o) he's a handsome little man.

February 24, 2010 at 9:33 AM  
Blogger MommyLovesStilettos said...

That is amazing!! I'm so glad to hear that he's doing well!!! :)

February 24, 2010 at 9:40 AM  
Blogger Eternal Lizdom said...

Oh wow wow WOW!! What an amazing story and turn of events!!

My brother- who is currently a junior in high school- had delays until he was about 3 or 4. Then they subsided. He had a very involved mom and a very nurturing and teaching home environment. He struggles a bit now and has gone through a lot of tests and such. They now know he has a hearing problem- he basically only catches and comprehends a certain number of words in a sentence. It's a minor disability and it's easy to work with.

So there may be troubles later on down the road- but given that he has an awesome mom and home environment- he'll come through whatever lies ahead just fine.

As always- when in doubt- I always turn to prayer!

February 24, 2010 at 9:40 AM  
Blogger Kearsie said...

What a sweet Bear.

I will pray for him, that he continues to grow and learn, and for you, Mommy, that you will have the wisdom and peace to handle anything that may come up.

February 24, 2010 at 9:58 AM  
Blogger Jules AF said...

That is awesome! Is he in speech?!?

February 24, 2010 at 10:03 AM  
Blogger Alexis AKA MOM said...

I'm tearing up right along with you, what a wonderful thing! I'm so glad he's been able to take such leaps and bounds! What a wonderful story and blessings!

Many prayers with you and the family!

February 24, 2010 at 10:08 AM  
Blogger Jennifer said...

You are such a great mommy!!

I'm so glad to hear that Little Bear is continuing to improve! He is such a handsome little bugger :-)

February 24, 2010 at 10:09 AM  
Blogger Secret Mom Thoughts said...

So happy to hear Bear is doing well.

February 24, 2010 at 10:30 AM  
Anonymous Anonymous said...

Oh that's so awesome!! I'm so glad things are getting better for you guys! I have been there countless times with my son - he was born with Down Syndrome and in the last year we've discovered he also has SPD stemming from high functioning Autism. It's been a long road through evals & therapy but he is making his way nicely through it all. And it's such an amazing thing to watch as they grow & progress. When I look at my son now it's crazy to think of how he was a year ago. He's such a different kid thanks, in part, to the amazing teachers & therapists he has that have never given up on him.

February 24, 2010 at 10:31 AM  
Blogger Unknown said...

Oh, you have me tearing up with you reading this post! I'm so, so, so, glad that he is improving so well! I would take him for the full one too, because after all you have been through, you want to make sure you're thorough. You're a dedicated mom, I can feel your emotions through your words! Good luck today and lots of love to you and that precious little boy.

February 24, 2010 at 10:46 AM  
Blogger Daisygirl said...

My son has some characteristics that are very similar to Bears.
We adopted him from Guatemala so he was always a bit different than us but then he started showing autistic traits. He was screened for autism and we were told what he has was a social issue and very mild it would most likely go away on its own.

We are now learning of this SPD and think we may have found out what he has. He has high anxiety (if you watch the video I posted of him yesterday you can see it), he can't answer simple questions without being coaxed and if at some point you don't help him come up with the answer he will completely shut down.
I am so happy to hear that your lil guy is pulling through this and opening up, it brings me hope. We didn't get my son into an early intervention because we were told he was "a delightful sweet child" I blame myself for listening to that lady...so needless to say when things started getting worse it was to late for the state to help us out. He will be 4 in a couple weeks and is probably at a 2 1/2 year olds learning level when it comes to emotions and friendships...we are working on it and all I can do is just love him!

Thanks for posting this and sorry my comment is so long...your Bear is beautiful!!!

February 24, 2010 at 10:48 AM  
Blogger Dee said...

That is FANTASTIC and he is ADORABLE!

February 24, 2010 at 10:51 AM  
Blogger Michelle @Flying Giggles said...

First of all...adorable! I am so happy he has progressed. As a parent it is so hard to just hope and pray that things go well, all we want is for our children to be okay. Why didn't anyone tell us how difficult it would be?

February 24, 2010 at 10:51 AM  
Blogger Danielle said...

I'm not a mother yet but I suspect I too will always worry about my kids when I do have them.

As a EI evaluator, your absolutely right there is a limit as to what a three year old can and will do and if we need to have them come back sometimes we will do that to get better information but it doesnt necessarily mean anything bad.

I believe (and again not a mom yet so I can't say how my thoughts will change when I am), your in charge of the 'nurture' component in the nature/nurture argument.. You are in charge of loving and working with and teaching and caring with all your heart for your child.

God's up to the nature aspect and prayer is awesome and God is awesome, but you cannot control it so your son will do whatever he can or cannot do and its just your job to love him!:)

and I think your doing awesome at that!

:)
hugs

February 24, 2010 at 10:55 AM  
Blogger Shelle-BlokThoughts said...

I love to read posts like this. Good things happen to everyone...but the hope and understanding you portray is so uplifting!

Your little boy looks like he stepped out of a magazine!

February 24, 2010 at 10:59 AM  
Blogger Unknown said...

He is so cute! We were almost at the point with Bo when he was around 2-3. Now, he is one of the smartest kids I know. And I'm not saying that because I'm his mother. He spells & he turned 5 in Dec. He still has hearing issues, but that has nothing to do with his delay.

February 24, 2010 at 11:19 AM  
Blogger Sarah at The Stroller Ballet said...

This post made me have tears in my eyes! I'm glad to hear your little one is doing better. Stay strong!

February 24, 2010 at 11:46 AM  
Blogger Tgoette said...

Great story! It's a blessing that he has rebounded so well and I am so happy for you and your family! Such a cute boy too! Doing great, mom!

February 24, 2010 at 11:49 AM  
Blogger Elle said...

What a fantastic post! We're having similar struggles with my four-year-old nephew right now, and the "not knowing"--whether he'll grow out of it, whether it's a result of trauma, whether it's hereditary--is frustrating, scary, and sad.

I'm so glad Bear is doing so much better! What a relief and a blessing, I'm sure!

February 24, 2010 at 12:05 PM  
Blogger Krystyn @ Really, Are You Serious? said...

What a cutie. Worrying is what we moms do best right? And, it's best to go with your gut. I would have done the exact same thing.

So glad your little Bear is doing better and making progress.

February 24, 2010 at 12:19 PM  
Blogger Laura said...

Such a sweet post about a sweet boy. I'm glad he is doing well.

February 24, 2010 at 12:28 PM  
Blogger This Ro(a)mantic Life said...

Wonderful news, Shell. In your shoes, I imagine I'd opt for the full evaluation too. I've always found it more helpful to get thorough answers when they're available -- but to each her own.

February 24, 2010 at 12:36 PM  
Blogger Crazed Mama said...

Yeah for Bear and you Mama. I am an Early Intervention Specialist and it is because of mama's like you that kids make progress like his! Big hugs from the other side of NC

February 24, 2010 at 12:53 PM  
Blogger The Mommyologist said...

I am just so happy to hear that he is improving so much!! I can't even imagine what you have gone through with worrying about him. I am SO thrilled to hear that things are looking up and that he's on the right track now!!

February 24, 2010 at 12:59 PM  
Anonymous Anonymous said...

Aw!! He is adorable. And I am so glad that he is doing well. Thats just awesome news!!!

February 24, 2010 at 1:35 PM  
Blogger Joy said...

glad all is going well and glad top hear that you are so proactive at getting him help and not just sitting back and letting him get a label and live with that.

February 24, 2010 at 1:56 PM  
Blogger Confessions From A Work-At-Home Mom said...

I KNOW the full screening will go just fine. You brought tears to MY eyes, too!

~Elizabeth
Confessions From A Working Mom

February 24, 2010 at 1:58 PM  
Blogger Unknown said...

Oh, honey, I LOVED this post. The realness of it. I felt as if I were there with you while I was reading this. I am so happy for you and you are such a loving, caring Mommy.

He is a cutie pie--so adorable!

I know this afternoon will go wonderfully for him and for you. Sending you love and prayers.

xoxo

February 24, 2010 at 2:05 PM  
Blogger Samantha said...

Great post. I hope that he continues to improve, and he is too cute!

February 24, 2010 at 2:27 PM  
Blogger Lisa said...

He's such a little cutie!! I'll admit I got tears in my eyes reading your post. I am so happy for you that he has improved and getting more awesome all the time:) Bigs Hugs to you Girl!!

February 24, 2010 at 2:29 PM  
Blogger Momma Fargo said...

He is absolutely a very beautiful child! Sounds like you are on top of things and taking the right measures for him. Keep up the good parenting. Great strides already!

Big hugs and prays sent your way!

February 24, 2010 at 2:46 PM  
Blogger Margaret said...

He is so cute!!!!!!!!! At least he is improving and getting better. I hope everything goes well for you.

Your family is in my thoughts and prayers.

February 24, 2010 at 3:09 PM  
Blogger Erin said...

That was so beautiful. Thank you for sharing his struggles and triumphs. You are such a good Mom. I hope that he continues to show progress.

February 24, 2010 at 3:15 PM  
Blogger Anna said...

What a nice story of success and triumph. What is "normal" anyway? It's too bad that we as moms feel so much pressure for our children to fit into society's definition of normal. I feel it too, but also try to embrace the differences of my child and love even the things others may see as negative attributes, because they too make him who he is.
I'm so happy Bear has made such progress!

February 24, 2010 at 3:30 PM  
Blogger Shari@Tales from the Sippy Cup said...

I cannot even imagine how strong you must be. You said you were writing with tears in your eyes, but what mom couldn't help but read this with tears in theirs? I am happy to hear that your beautiful child is improving. He's such a doll!

February 24, 2010 at 3:42 PM  
Blogger Ams said...

Aw, he is absolutely gorgeous!!
Parenting is the hardest thing we will ever do in our lifetime and to watch our kids struggle? Oh my goodness, there are no words to describe how hard that is.
I love this post... and what a blessing indeed!

February 24, 2010 at 3:59 PM  
Blogger Shandal said...

Stay strong Momma. That's a very heart wrenching story for a Mom to have to tell as it is her own story. I can only imagine your feelings going through all that. What a relief though that he seems to be doing better. I'm glad you're getting more tests done. A mother knows what's best for her children. I'll be thinking of you guys for the rest of the day. :)

((Hugs))

February 24, 2010 at 4:00 PM  
Blogger Sara said...

How wonderful!

It sounds like something clicked for him that is allowing better communication and far less frustration.

So glad to hear it!

February 24, 2010 at 4:17 PM  
Blogger Unknown said...

Oh Shell, I am soooo glad Bear is doing so much better.

I would have gone ahead with the expanded testing as well...like you said, if there is a delay that is lingering it is better to get the intensive therapies now rather than later.

(Hugs) to you and your sweet little boy!

February 24, 2010 at 4:33 PM  
Blogger Sonora said...

The part about you going into his room at night and praying and crying for him brought tears to my eyes. It is one of the hardest things as a mother to watch your child struggle and not know how to help them. I am so glad he is doing better!

February 24, 2010 at 4:56 PM  
Blogger Kiera said...

such a good story! go beary

February 24, 2010 at 5:02 PM  
Blogger Jeannie, Jane, Angel, Mommy, etc.. said...

My little cousin has sensory. He also has an issue with his ears. He has had several surgeries to help. So glad to know that your little man is getting better.

February 24, 2010 at 5:02 PM  
Blogger Mrs. Micek said...

He is such an adorable little boy! You are one lucky mom!! I'm glad things are getting better for you both! :)

Sending my Love!

February 24, 2010 at 5:26 PM  
Blogger Tam and John said...

Beautiful tribute to your littel guy, Shell. And to you, for being such a strong and loving mom. You are both very lucky!

February 24, 2010 at 6:37 PM  
Blogger Busymomsteph said...

Shell, I am so glad that he did well on his evaluation. Follow your instincts, never stop fighting for him, you can never ask for too much. We have gone through issues with two of our children and had to fight all the way to make sure that they have recieved all of the interventions and assistance that they need. You are his best advocate and as long as he has you on his side he will be fine.

February 24, 2010 at 6:45 PM  
Blogger A GAL NEEDS... said...

It sounds really encouraging for your little man. I also would want to do everything possible to bring him up to speed! It's a scary thing to have to stare the A word in the face. Hats off and congratulations! He's really really cute!

February 24, 2010 at 8:09 PM  
Blogger Mellodee said...

There is nothing so wonderful as watching good things happen for your children!!

February 24, 2010 at 8:35 PM  
Anonymous Anonymous said...

Glad Bear is doing much better. I have had that A word thrown at me about Lil Big Man. You guys are in my prayers ((hugs))

February 24, 2010 at 8:35 PM  
Anonymous Anonymous said...

Aw, Shell, that so touched my heart. So glad to hear Bear is okay. He's very lucky to have a mom like you. :0)

February 24, 2010 at 8:46 PM  
Blogger Christina said...

What a beautiful boy you have! I am so glad he is doing better. What a great mom he has!!

February 24, 2010 at 8:47 PM  
Blogger Sarah and the Gentlemen said...

Oh man, Shell. That's so hard. I'm so glad to hear that he is improving and you can breathe better now.

February 24, 2010 at 9:17 PM  
Blogger Cameron said...

wow, I was welling up in tears reading this. I'm about to have my first child in may, and I can't even fathom all that you go through in worrying and hoping for your boy. I hope that the hardest part is done and he's in for a normal life ...you are a great mom.

thanks for sharing.
Cameron
www.conquerthemonkey.com

February 24, 2010 at 9:32 PM  
Blogger Foursons said...

He is gorgeous. Just remember, he is the same child before the diagnosis and after. The label doesn't change who your beautiful little boy is.

My Jakob is on the autism spectrum. Which is HUGE by the way. If by chance the tests come back with non stellar results and you want to chat- I'm here. :)

February 24, 2010 at 10:48 PM  
Blogger Vanessa said...

This gave me goosebumps! I'm so happy to hear that he's done so well, I pray he continues to improve!!

February 24, 2010 at 10:58 PM  
Blogger Jessica Jones, ATL Mom of 3 said...

HOow amazing!
and How stinkin cut is he!!!!
HUGS momma paying today went well!

February 24, 2010 at 11:06 PM  
Blogger Grilled Cheese said...

How truly wonderful.

So happy to hear of this amazing change!

February 24, 2010 at 11:26 PM  
Blogger Holly's Mummy said...

*Tears... welling*
A lovely post! Well done all of you!

February 25, 2010 at 6:52 AM  
Blogger Jayme said...

Goodness he's cute!
And you are such a wonderful mom and great advocate for him, way to go!

February 25, 2010 at 7:04 AM  
Blogger Jene said...

What an amazing story. You must be so happy that he's growing up to be a healthy little boy. Thank you for sharing!

February 25, 2010 at 7:48 AM  
Blogger Jennifer said...

I'm new to reading your blog, but this post brought tears to my eyes. What a sweet little boy he is!!

Praying that he continues to heal and soar with leaps and bounds!

~ Jennifer

February 25, 2010 at 8:14 AM  
Blogger Desert Rose said...

I know you have spoken of difficulties before, so happy to hear that there is progress! Yay for him and the family!

February 25, 2010 at 11:21 AM  
Blogger Masala Chica said...

He's a beautiful boy and will be that much stronger because of the challenges he has gone through - he is lucky to have your guys as parents.

He will soar with love and support from you.

kiran

February 25, 2010 at 12:17 PM  
Blogger Stephanie said...

Shell! I'm so behind in my reading I had no idea the day you were having!
You have one strong beautiful little boy there. And one strong Mama to see him through what ever he might need. It sounds like he has made unbelievable gains in the last little while! Such a blessing!
As a Resource Consultant who used to sit and hold the hands of parents while their babes were being assessed by a team of "professionals" I would just like to say no one knows your boy better then you. Always follow your gut and you will never be wrong.
You go girl, and congratulations on every little victory.

February 25, 2010 at 1:58 PM  
Blogger SPEAKING FROM THE CRIB said...

had to read this. he is a beautiful baby boy and such a little blessing. i am so glad he bounced back. they are tougher than we ever think they are :) big hugs from just another motherbitch

February 25, 2010 at 2:49 PM  
Blogger Bibi @ Bibi's Culinary Journey said...

He's such a sweet little boy. I am so glad to hear that he's doing well.

My little nephew is going through evaluations for AS right now. I know what they will tell us, but my little sister is living in denial.I wish I could snap her put of it so she can concentrate on her little guy and help him along the way.

Bear is so lucky to have such a caring and loving mama bear.

February 25, 2010 at 2:58 PM  
Blogger MrsBlogAlot said...

He is precious. I'm so glad to hear of his progress!!! Sweet boy!!!!

February 25, 2010 at 3:33 PM  
Blogger Tammy said...

He is such a cutie...love his smile. I am so glad you shared this story. It will help so many moms out there not knowing what they need to be doing for their child. Give little Bear a bug hug all the way from WA.

February 25, 2010 at 9:30 PM  
Blogger Lothiriel said...

aaawww...!! I'm so happy he's better! He's so cute!!

February 25, 2010 at 11:23 PM  
Blogger Messy Mommy said...

It's so hard to watch your child go through something like that. We went through something similar with Otter and his epilepsy. Prayer is power and God is a miracle worker! Praying for you and Bear!

February 25, 2010 at 11:59 PM  
Blogger HeatherOz said...

I'm so glad that things are getting better for you and your cute Bear. Both of my boys had speech and physical delays. After they started preschool they really made a lot of progress. Now they are the youngest kids in the "regular" 1st grade class. I'm so proud of them!

February 26, 2010 at 1:21 AM  
Blogger Deb said...

This is exactly the kind of story I needed to read tonight. I'm so happy that your boy--and YOU--are healing and I can feel your joy at Bear's progress. Thanks for the reminder to appreciate the little things. XOXO

February 26, 2010 at 8:23 PM  
Blogger Kimberly@PrettyPinkMomma said...

I am so glad to hear that Bear is doing so much better! Every child grows and learns at their own rate and in their own special way. This, I have had to learn.

Shell, you and I have so much in common - its crazy. My middle son, Benji who will be five in a month sounds exactly like your Bear. It was like you were talking about my son in your post - to a tee. We have been through so much with him, the A word was thrown around and now, thankfully, totally dismissed. I agree, thank goodness for songs! It helped communication so, so much!

He still receives private speech lessons and he also goes to a developmental preschool. Both of those have helped to thrive so that when he starts kindergarten next year hopefully he will be able to adjust and behave like how they expect a five year old to behave. I fear his social awkwardness combined with his speech issues will jeopardize his ability to learn alongside all of his classmates. Only time will tell. I wish for everyone to be able to see the bright, sensitive, loving, silly kid that I see. I too, remember the moments when I cried, praying to God for him to be seen as normal by other children as well as adults. I still struggle with it, as does he. He is very aware when another child points out that he is "weird" and it hurts his feelings. I just do my best to explain to him that he is special and if others can't see it than they are missing out on wonderful friend.

Sorry for this super long comment!!

February 28, 2010 at 6:31 PM  
Anonymous Anonymous said...

confessions of a working mom sent me over and I am so glad I did.
I have worked with many kiddos with different types of developmental delays and disabilities. Sounds like the early intervention has done wonders. Early intervention is the key. I am glad he is thriving and is happy. I can not even imagine how hard it has been for all of you. My thoughts are with you.

March 28, 2010 at 1:18 PM  
Blogger Katrina said...

I know this is an old post, but I just had to comment. This post really touched me. When you wrote "I tried my best to hold it together during the day, but I would go into his room when he was sleeping, run my fingers through his hair, and pray for God to heal him. And cry. Wanting him to be "normal."

I can totally relate to this. That was me a few years ago. In 1997 we were in a car accident and my then 4-year-old daughter was brain injured as a result. She spent 3 months in the hospital and came home to us not able to walk, not able to talk, not able to act or respond or play or do anything that she used to be able to do as a "normal: 4 year old. We worked very hard in her therapy with her, spent our days trying to get the "old" her back. And I kept very strong during the days. I kept positive, for her, for my other kids, for my husband. But oh, at night... at night when everyone else was sleeping...I'd cry. I'd go into the bathroom, turn on the tub water and just bawl. I'd cry the ugly cry, where you can't catch your breath and choke and hiccup the entire time. Where your face and eyes are all swollen and your nose is runny. And when I was done doing that, I'd go into her room, sit by her bed, stroke her head and marvel at how "normal" she looked when she was sleeping. I'd play tricks with my mind and imagine that she was my old girl again. And I'd let the tears fall down on her, as I prayed to God to let her be okay. I asked for "just a glimpse" of the old her now and then, just to keep me going. It was an awful time for me. I missed her SO much. I ached inside. So far in my life losing my daughter to a brain injury is the worst thing that has ever happened to me. And I say "losing her" because that's the honest truth. No, she didn't die. But the child she used to be was no longer there. Lost. The child that I had know for four years was not there anymore. Severe brain injuries are like that. The brain as it was is just wiped away. It's awful. Anyway, it took many, many years...but she relearned a lot. She learned to walk again, and talk again. She was never the "same" again, but in time I grew to accept that. Her recovery became my recovery, too, in a way ... accepting "what is" and letting go of "what used to be" and not thinking about "what should be" was a struggle for me. But I go there, in time. She is eighteen years old now. She is doing amazingly well. Better than anyone thought she would. She makes me extremely proud. I am so glad to read that your son is healing, too. Thank you for sharing his story :)

Katrina
They All Call Me Mom

November 3, 2011 at 3:53 AM  

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