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Thursday, March 11, 2010

Everybody's Doing It: Let's Talk About Sex

Did I get your attention?

Do you think this is another sex toy review or that I'm going to talk about some freaky past or even present?

I hate to disappoint, but I'm talking about married sex here today.

Vanessa at Much More than Mommy blogged about it yesterday and Elizabeth from Confessions from a Working Mom did it...though she couldn't actually say the "s" word. I've been wanting to write about this for a while and this seemed like the time.

My blinky ring girls at Bootcamp: we talked about it. Though, don't worry, I won't talk about anything that any of you said. Even though I'm convinced one of you is a liar...okay, not really....I'm just jealous. *ahem*

Anyway, watch this be the one time that Hubs decides he's going to take the time to read my blog and then freak out because I'm talking about our sex life.

But, I think he'll like what I have to say.

I said I was going to talk about married sex, but more accurately, it should be: married-with-kids sex.

You know the drill here. He works or you do or you both do and you have the kids to take care of, the house to keep up with, and bills to pay. It's a long day with too much to think about, too much to do. No real free time to just be together and enjoy each other, just a whole lot of being tired and knowing that the next day isn't going to be any easier.

But, here's the thing: If my husband wants to have sex, we do.

That's right.

I don't say no.

Now, I'm not talking about times when he acts like a total ass and then thinks that we can make love. He's learned not to even try then.

I'm talking about just your average night when we are both tired, wanting to go to sleep, or we have other things to do, or are just feeling fat or whatever.

On those nights, I don't ever say no.

Because, really, I never regret it. We never make love and then I think "gee, I wish I hadn't just pleased my husband."

Now, I'm not saying that you have to go all out every time and try to have a marathon session. Or that you even have to try to be overly creative.

Your husband likes sex. He's okay with it not being creative every time.  He's even okay when you think hmm, if I do this, it will all be over in about a minute and then I can go to sleep. You know this, whatever your particular this is. I'm not here to talk about your own personal bag of tricks or my own. *blushes* But, he's not going to complain about your this.

My husband LOVES that when his friends complain about their wives not wanting to "do it" any more, he never has anything to contribute to that conversation. He just sits there with a smug grin on his face, letting them be jealous of him, knowing what his silence means.

I do believe that it is part of my role as his wife for us to have an intimate relationship.

You notice I'm not talking about my needs or desires here. But, let's be realistic here. It's really rare that there's a time when I want to and he doesn't. So, it's sort of a moot point. And, probably tmi, though I've passed that point a long time ago, I like making love with my husband. There, I said it. And it's nothing to be ashamed of. You are supposed to enjoy your husband.

I do think that our marriage is stronger because we have this part of it. No, you can't save your marriage with sex. But, you certainly won't hurt it by making love to your husband instead of turning him down.

I'm actually going to issue you a challenge. This is a very personal thing and I'm not going to ask you to report back, though if you want to, please do.

For the next week, try to say yes to your husband. No no's or headaches or too tireds or waiting until he's asleep to head to bed. For one week, make lovin' a priority in your marriage. And just see if it doesn't make a difference.

Labels:

89 Comments:

Blogger Ma What's 4 dinner said...

Hey girl, right there with you. I never say no either. What's the point? He'll just be pissy and I'll just be sleeping so the way I look at it is it's a win win for everyone. And at least he can't say I'm not giving it up anymore (like everyone else's wife right?)

No complaints here girl!! And a little bout of cardio is good for you right???

Alex

March 11, 2010 at 6:44 AM  
Blogger Rebecca said...

Saying yes is the best thing I can do for my marriage...I try to accommodate (literally and figuratively) whenever I can...or whenever we don't pass out in the middle of a conversation! Haha...good for you guys too!

March 11, 2010 at 6:49 AM  
Blogger Oka said...

Wonder what is my next challenge...right now I am to eat a late dinner and have sex every night. Who (and what will it be) is going to come up with something else I have to add???

March 11, 2010 at 6:52 AM  
Blogger danita said...

amen!

March 11, 2010 at 7:24 AM  
Blogger danita said...

amen!

March 11, 2010 at 7:24 AM  
Blogger Unknown said...

Ook see this would work for me but whenhe doesn't get in lately till around 11 or so he never asks. I wish he would ask, or hint, or heck anything..

March 11, 2010 at 7:25 AM  
Blogger The Mommyologist said...

I'd say yes for sure...that is if he actually ASKED or ATTEMPTED more than once in a blue moon. I still think I made a mistake by letting him watch me give birth. He should've stayed up by my head instead of watching the entire show. I don't think my cha-cha has the same appeal anymore.

March 11, 2010 at 7:38 AM  
Anonymous Anonymous said...

I never say no - maybe the occassional "Do whatever you want, just don't wake me up" LOL - but never no.

Now, he doesn't ask everynight... if he asked Every Single Night I might have to say no at some point ;-)

Hubby actually told my DAD one time (pre-kids) that I was the nympho... hmmmm... doesn't complain about that anymore! LOL

March 11, 2010 at 7:43 AM  
Blogger Kiera said...

you go girl. i actually for real am going to try. it really does bring us closer and we get along better when were doin it!

March 11, 2010 at 7:51 AM  
Anonymous Anonymous said...

Yes, you are so right. I _know_ that I need to do this, now I just have to DO it! Thanks for the reminder.

March 11, 2010 at 8:01 AM  
Blogger Evonne said...

Good challenge and I think everyone should try it.

You don't realize what a difference it makes until you start saying yes more often (take that however you wish - lol). It really makes you closer as a couple, happier people, and seems to make the show go a lot smoother.

March 11, 2010 at 8:44 AM  
Blogger Samantha said...

I agree, although, it does get hard sometimes. I'm going to accept your challenge :)

March 11, 2010 at 8:57 AM  
Blogger Rock, Paper, Scissors said...

Well put! I am completely impressed with this post.

(You know everyone is reading the comments trying to figure out who does and who doesn't- or is that just me?)

March 11, 2010 at 9:01 AM  
Blogger Unknown said...

It's like I told Vanessa yesterday, sex and workingout might not be things you always feellike doing but most of the time you are happy afterwords!

March 11, 2010 at 9:04 AM  
Blogger Yankee Girl said...

My husband and I are trying to have sex 700 times in one year. By having a lot of sex, I just want it more. And since we are literally having sex at every free moment, there is no time for fighting or disagreements. Having sex is definitely working for us and keeping us happy.

March 11, 2010 at 9:11 AM  
Blogger Rebekah @ Mom-In-A-Million said...

I love this idea! I may have to start drinking coffee after dinner to facilitate it but hey? I like coffee. And also sex.

March 11, 2010 at 9:14 AM  
Blogger Kmama said...

Great post. I know that I'm definitely one to say more on most occassions...but I'm already working on that.

March 11, 2010 at 9:19 AM  
Blogger Vanessa said...

If I didn't have my laptop right on top of me, I would be jumping up and down saying, "You go girl!!" Hang on, I'm going to put the computer aside and do it

...

Okay, all done! :-) I think your challenge sounds EXCELLENT!

March 11, 2010 at 9:28 AM  
Blogger Jules AF said...

That sounds like a great idea. Too bad I'm not married and don't have to worry about it.

March 11, 2010 at 9:29 AM  
Blogger Sassy Salsa girl said...

You know I was thinking about this the other day and a question came to my mind.

When you say no to sex is it really because you are too tired, have a headache, etc... or is it really just laziness?

Am I really to lazy to do something that is quite pleasurable?

March 11, 2010 at 9:37 AM  
Blogger MommyLisa said...

I wish my husband would ask more - and I bet he wishes I would ask more.

I guess I will just have to jump him this week. He is always happier when I do...

March 11, 2010 at 9:37 AM  
Blogger Geezees Custom Canvas Art said...

agreed , i never regret when I say yes ...it is always both of us saying "We should do this more often" ....challenge on!

March 11, 2010 at 9:54 AM  
Blogger The Grasshoppa:Triplets Plus Two Momma said...

Grasshoppa's never lie---***wink***


(that is why they have to drop out of back stabbing---conevying games like Survivor!) LMAO!!!!

March 11, 2010 at 10:07 AM  
Blogger The Grasshoppa:Triplets Plus Two Momma said...

@TheMommyologist: girlfriend---maybe you should get your cha-cha "VAJAZZLED" like I have been reading all the hot movie stars do!!

March 11, 2010 at 10:09 AM  
Blogger Jenn said...

What a great post, great challenge, and great philosophy! Must admit that, since I was so deathly sick in pregnancy, I'm a little afraid of 'it' these days ... sooo not ready to be pregnant/sick/hooked up to IVs again any time soon! But, as much as that took a toll on my life(and my marriage), avoiding 'it' like the plague isn't helping either! Good thing husband is patient ... perhaps he should be rewarded! TMI? Sorry, still on my first cup of coffee!

March 11, 2010 at 10:18 AM  
Blogger CA Heaven said...

Nice post!
Interesting to read how you see this from the female side.
I have a Hell of a lot to say about this (and more) seen from my side. Have two posts on this almost ready, guess they will appear next week.

March 11, 2010 at 10:40 AM  
Blogger Daisygirl said...

Let's talk about sex baby, lets talk about you and me..every time I hear that sentence I think of that song!

I agree with you 100% sex is important in a marriage! We have our good weeks full of lovin and our dry ones...haha! I like your challenge and challenges always makes things interesting because seriously who doesn't love a little competition!?
And like I told Elizabeth yesterday...its a calorie burner!!!

March 11, 2010 at 10:54 AM  
Blogger Sarah and the Gentlemen said...

Oooo... A Challenge! I like a good challenge.

March 11, 2010 at 11:02 AM  
Blogger Liz Mays said...

Well... I'm SOL in this regard. But my day will come again. :)

March 11, 2010 at 11:14 AM  
Blogger Mrs. Micek said...

I'm in.... :)

March 11, 2010 at 11:35 AM  
Anonymous Anonymous said...

I'm in too!

March 11, 2010 at 11:42 AM  
Blogger Ducky said...

I guess I'm a nymph...he's the one that turns me down! It's actually a running joke....I love my hubs. He's such a great man!

Great post Shell!

March 11, 2010 at 11:49 AM  
Blogger gina said...

I never say no either. And in fact if i notice we are nitpicking at each other ,I can usually step back and see that it's been 3 or 4 days- so instead of arguing- I seduce hime. Works every time. Sex can't SAVE a marriage but it can certainly ease a lot of tension! ;)

March 11, 2010 at 11:57 AM  
Anonymous Anonymous said...

you just went to the top of my list....


wonderful

March 11, 2010 at 12:40 PM  
Blogger MommyLovesStilettos said...

I'm not married, but I never say no. :)

I love it as much as he does and we "do it" nearly every day! LOL

March 11, 2010 at 12:49 PM  
Blogger Jo said...

Hi, Shell! Thank you so much for becoming a follower and for your kind comments when visiting me on my SITS day on Friday! :)

Peace and serenity,
~Jo
'The End Of The Rainbow: Life After Bankruptcy'

March 11, 2010 at 1:13 PM  
Blogger Lothiriel said...

I hear ya! Hubby travels a lot so I'm always ready like a bitch in heat, when he comes home!

March 11, 2010 at 1:20 PM  
Blogger Tammy said...

I never say no either. There are times I would just like to go to sleep but I know how much he loves it and when I am in the moment, it's great! Good for you girl to bring this up...it's nice talking to girlfriends about things like this and to know our marriage is just like everyone elses!

March 11, 2010 at 1:30 PM  
Blogger Melinda said...

What an awesome post ... needed to be said! I'm so glad you had the guts to just put it out there. You're right. You never regret it when you make your husband happy.

I love your new design ... in fact, I visited your blog earlier today and thought I got the address wrong! I didn't recognize it! ;0)

March 11, 2010 at 2:09 PM  
Blogger Erin said...

I wish I could participate in this challenge... :(

Give me a couple of months until DH gets back, k?

March 11, 2010 at 2:28 PM  
Blogger Brandi said...

Um, no thanks. LOL! I'm one of those that could be totally set with once a month and my hubby couldn't get enough if it was everyday. We came up with our own solution a few years back. I just agree to every other day and that way there's no stress. He knows when he's going to get it and I know when I don't have to shave my legs. ;) Romantic, no?

March 11, 2010 at 2:44 PM  
Blogger Leiah said...

Let me give you something to look forward to. I'm an (ahem) older mom whose daughter no longer lives at home and That Man (aka the boyfriend) also has no children living at home. There's nothing like that look between you and the next thing you know there's some red hot monkey sex going on. I recently spent a weekend with some of my high school girlfriends who all still had children at home, some of them elementary age. They couldn't believe we could just have sex whenever and wherever we wanted and that it was never "scheduled". I'm also one that will initiate it as much if not more than he does and he loves that. OK, before I start bordering on TMI with tales of 4 hour sessions, I probably better stop writing huh? Great post and I for one endorse EVERYONE participating. After all, you're probably going to be tired anyway you might as well enjoy getting there.

March 11, 2010 at 3:17 PM  
Blogger Jenny said...

totally like what Brandi says....every other day and they know they are going to get some...you are right though...there is always an excuse...on to saying YES!

March 11, 2010 at 3:30 PM  
Blogger Alexis AKA MOM said...

those are true words I need to be better at saying yes, some days I'm just so pooped but I need to be better. Thanks girlie!

March 11, 2010 at 3:44 PM  
Blogger Tgoette said...

Shell, I wish we could take this blog and broadcast it over every channel over and over again! On behalf of men everywhere, bless you! bless you! It's such a shame more women aren't as on board with the sex thing as you are. If ever you want to run for President, you have my vote! LOL!

March 11, 2010 at 3:50 PM  
Blogger Your mom said...

I wrote a blog on orgasms yesterday--30-50% of women wish they could have more. I encourage sex lives where BOTH spouses get their cookies!

I try not to tell my hubby no because he makes sure it is always SUPER fun and pleasurable for me too :)

All that to say I'm IN!

www.whereisthemeinmommy.blogspot.com

March 11, 2010 at 5:44 PM  
Blogger AiringMyLaundry said...

I usually give in but some nights I say heck to the NO. After a long day the last thing I want to be is pawed at. I need my space. But like I said, I usually do give in.

March 11, 2010 at 6:00 PM  
Blogger L said...

Oh man I kind of feel guilty for falling asleep early last night so yes I will definitely accept the challenge! And did you pull this "He's even okay when you think hmm, if I do this, it will all be over in about a minute and then I can go to sleep" from my brain!!? lol ha ha ha! Great post though btw!

March 11, 2010 at 6:18 PM  
Anonymous Anonymous said...

Hubby tells me I'm a "monotonous nympho". I don't say no either. :)

Laughed when you said he has nothing to contribute to the conversation about lack of nookie. Philip's friends are all either single guys or are stationed out here and away from their girlfriends, so they're jealous that he has a wife here and is "gettin' it on the daily."

March 11, 2010 at 8:02 PM  
Blogger Jenn said...

Well, I can't participate this week as hubby isn't home, but he's home next week!??!? Trust me, after a month of no hubby, he won't even have to ask while he's home!!!!

March 11, 2010 at 8:08 PM  
Blogger Diana said...

Great post Shell...

I have NEVER told my hubs "no" in 7 years of marriage! And to be honest there are times when I'm tired and would rather go tot sleep. Or well, actually, since he prefers mornings lol... times I'm not ready to wake up for it. (He's the morning person in this family, not me.) But he knows how to get me awake *wink* so it all works out.

And now with the baby chihuahua who is the baby in this family and needy for attention, we have to work around her. Makes it more challenging and we both are ready at the drop of a hat for any chance that comes around. LOL

March 11, 2010 at 8:39 PM  
Anonymous Anonymous said...

Who knew you were a sex therapist on top of everything else! Sheesh! I'm the queen of excuses... my husband literally asks me Every Single Day and I definitely say no more than yes. But he still loves me. still sticks by me. Still tells me I'm hot. :) But - you're on. I might be tired by the end of the week... but i won't say no.

March 11, 2010 at 8:44 PM  
Blogger Unknown said...

Okay, if this shows up three times, sorry! I'm having blog glitches today,..

I think this is a great idea! I don't necessarily say yes 7 days a week, but we do very regularly. We do not let a week go by, no matter what is going on in our lives. It helps create a sense of intimacy, and helps you face whatever issues you are facing, together. This is a fantastic post!!

March 11, 2010 at 9:19 PM  
Blogger Messy Mommy said...

Okay you talked me into it!

If a strange man calls praising you, it's Hubby.

Okay so are we linking up our own videos tomorrow? No more "has to be up at 9" rule? Not that I'm worried. No one could probably beat me anyway. Haha, just kidding, sorta.

March 11, 2010 at 9:27 PM  
Blogger Lisa said...

I can't take the challenge...I never say no to Britt either...I did that to my exes. :)

March 11, 2010 at 9:59 PM  
Blogger Dumb Mom said...

I'm with you girlfriend. If we left it up to me we'd probably never do it, so we leave it up to him. Luckily, Dumb Dad's not a horny sex monkey so it's all good. It's probably the only thing he can't complain about which is a good thing. Right?

March 11, 2010 at 10:45 PM  
Blogger Unknown said...

Love it. I think the only time I told him no was when I was sick a few weeks ago--and HE gave it to me, so it's his own fault, really...

Anyway. Sex is amazing. I love it. I'm not going to lie. Even if I am exhausted and had a crappy day I'll do it. Because honestly? a) it always makes me happy and b) i usually sleep a lot better afterward...

Awesome post--and Leo may be your #1 fan for challenging us to have more sex, ha!

xo

March 11, 2010 at 10:55 PM  
Blogger Jenn said...

Just found your blog, but thought I would chime in. FIrst off my husband is out of town for work ALL WEEK and the lack of sex is starting to get to me! LOL We have been married 11 years, known each other for 20 years, two kids and STILL love the sex and each other.

He can't complain to his friends and he better be braggin! hehe

Thanks for sharing your thoughts on the subject and totally agree. :)

March 11, 2010 at 11:10 PM  
Blogger Jessica Jones, ATL Mom of 3 said...

Is it weird that thought has NEVER crossed my mind...but you are right! Things are better when you take the time to be intimant...I am SO taking your challenege...is there a button or mclinky somewhere i need???

March 11, 2010 at 11:13 PM  
Blogger Melissa said...

I'm with ya...I don't ever say no, even if it is not at the top of my list at the moment. I think it is interesting how women will complain, "If he would just help around the house, that would mean SO much to me!" I think that for a lot of men, "If she would just give me sex more often, it would mean SO much to me!" I know that's a way I can keep him happy and taken care of, and in return, he is super helpful with the kids and around the house. I think it is so important, and I feel bad for the guys who never get it!

March 11, 2010 at 11:20 PM  
Blogger Twincerely,Olga said...

great post and very true!!! trying to say yes more!!!

March 11, 2010 at 11:40 PM  
Blogger Shannon K. said...

Good advice. I think the same way...I don't ever regret it. What would that say if it were the case?

March 12, 2010 at 12:17 AM  
Blogger Unknown said...

You go girl! Way to issue a challenge!

However, I am usually the one trying to attack my hubby and he is the one who is tired. What's the deal?

March 12, 2010 at 7:29 AM  
Blogger Unknown said...

What a wonderful post. I have to say that before I became ill and mostly bedridden I too never said no. I felt it was my job as a wife to not say no to my husband. I am also one of those submissive wives, gasp. I just feel like when I try to be the best I can be our marriage is wonderful and the way God intended it to be.

March 12, 2010 at 7:52 AM  
Blogger Di said...

Visiting from FF. I usually don't say no - unless he comes in at 2am after watching TV and I am passed out cold with drool all over me. Sorry not interested - but otherwise - 6pm on the couch - sure babe - no problem! :)

March 12, 2010 at 9:42 AM  
Blogger Ms. Sarah said...

Hi Found you on follow friday. i am not a girl who says no. 9 times of out 10 its me saying lets go and hurry up. I know my time with the hubby is limited. He is leaving for the army.

Have a great weekend and I look forward to reading more

March 12, 2010 at 1:02 PM  
Blogger Confessions From A Work-At-Home Mom said...

You're right... there's sex... there's married sex... and there's married-with-kids sex... three VERY different variations on a theme!

~Elizabeth
Confessions From A Working Mom

March 12, 2010 at 1:34 PM  
Blogger ♥ LLL with Leslie ♥ said...

I found you through follow friday. I am now following you :)

www.livelovelaughwithleslie.com

March 12, 2010 at 3:25 PM  
Blogger Ms D said...

Passing by from FF, I am now following you :) Love your blog!

March 12, 2010 at 3:28 PM  
Blogger Unknown said...

And then there's married for 35 years, on high blood pressure meds sex. I never say no, more like, now???? Please??????????? Sex is different these days, more snuggles and cuddles. I am happy with all I can get, no matter that is no longer what it once was. Married love just continues to grow and develope over the years, making for comfort and security as we get older. We know we belong to each other forever.

Found you on Friday Follow. Come visit Steadfast and say hello.

March 12, 2010 at 3:30 PM  
Blogger Joy said...

What an introduction to your blog!!! This is a great post!

I'm a new follower ... happy FF.
:)

March 12, 2010 at 3:47 PM  
Blogger RN Mama said...

Hmmm... I rarely say no, but my husband rarely asks for "it" either. I wonder what that means? Maybe he's getting it somewhere else!?

March 12, 2010 at 4:37 PM  
Blogger CA Heaven said...

Here's the first partof my comment that I announced yesterday:

http://tinyurl.com/y8mo9xj

Don't read it if you don't like it. I don't intend to offend anyone. Sorry if I do >:)

March 12, 2010 at 5:07 PM  
Blogger Michelle Faith said...

Hey, Happy Friday follow! i'm a New follower, love meeting new blogging friends. Have a great weekend.

March 12, 2010 at 6:20 PM  
Anonymous Anonymous said...

Holy moly! I still can't believe you did this after falling down the stairs. I'd be nursing my ego. :0)

March 12, 2010 at 9:43 PM  
Blogger Joann Mannix said...

Hi! Stopping by from SITS and I have to tell you, I've been married 23 years and I am the same exact way.
My husband works hard, gives us all a beautiful life and it's just a fact of life, men are men. Their sex drive is one of the most innate parts of them. I constantly coach my friends. How hard is it to give a little something of yourself in return for a happy man. I feel the same way. There are many times I am bone tired, but I have never regretted saying yes. You should make a button for that! Just say Yes.

March 13, 2010 at 10:15 AM  
Anonymous Anonymous said...

Shell--I love this! You are right in everything you said. I love that we can talk about this and not feel shy or embarrased. It is a part of life and it's a great part of life. I love how you just say how it is. :) Great post! (as is all your others)

March 13, 2010 at 5:15 PM  
Blogger Tam and John said...

Hope it's not tmi to say that I am going to take your challenge. Everything you said is so true, and I know it, but I still don't make as much effort as I should. I'll let you know what happens. Not the details or anything. I love your blog :)

March 13, 2010 at 5:47 PM  
Anonymous Anonymous said...

I'm back because I realize I didn't even comment on the sex part.

I agree with you about an intimate relationship. While I have not always said yes every single time, we have a very active sex life. Also, I like sex. It feels good and keeps us close. Not just for the guys ya know.

We also flirt and talk dirty and meet for make out lunch. We've been married for almost 17 years now. Love it.

March 13, 2010 at 11:17 PM  
Blogger Sarah Coulsey said...

My Husband and I have been married almost 7 years, and together almost 11. We make love (and sometimes the hardcore sex!!!!) atleast twice a week. Very rarely do we ever say no to each other. When we do its usually because we are somewhere where we shouldnt be having sex anyway!!!!

Happy Sunday. I am a new Friday Follower!!

Sarah

sarahsblogoffun.blogspot.com

March 14, 2010 at 3:46 PM  
Blogger Freely Living Life said...

Hi there!

We came across your blog through the FF and are now following you! :) Hope you had a fantastic weekend! <3

March 15, 2010 at 12:11 AM  
Blogger mama of 4 said...

Just stumbled along and um.. after 9 years together (6 married) and 4 kids.. I never say no.. My hubby is the one that gets headaches... we generally do "something" everyday. ;)

March 15, 2010 at 3:22 PM  
Blogger Kat @ www.TodaysCliche.com said...

Gosh, what a test you're giving us, Shell!! For the love of God!

Actually, I started feeling really bad lately that I was putting him down, AND I realized (over a bottle of wine w/some of my friends the other day/night) that I never, and I mean NEVER, initiate.

So, I texted him some cutesy anticipatory words... actually gave him some major affection, and initiated the evening with some unexpected items... and I've NEVER seen him beam like that! It's ironic, b/c it was 2 days ago... right around when you initiated the challenge; however, I didn't read the challenge until right now!!

Thanks for keeping things in perpective!

March 17, 2010 at 10:55 AM  
Blogger Helene said...

Wow, girl, you're on a roll this week with all these "deep thought" kinds of posts. You're making me really think about all this!!

I'm guilty of saying no to my hubby at least 95% of the time. We can go months without having sex and I'm perfectly happy that way. But I do notice he stops asking after awhile and I usually have to initiate it to let him know that I'm game if he wants (and he NEVER turns me down).

I do notice that when we finally do have sex, I feel closer to him. We always end up laying there afterwards saying, "We should do this more often" but then I go back to denying him and eventually he stops asking.

I'm gonna try to say yes more often. It probably would help me feel more positive about our marriage.

Thank you for posting this! Have I told you lately how much I enjoy your blog??

March 17, 2010 at 11:20 PM  
Blogger Lindsey said...

LOVE this post, so I'm sticking around. Newest follower!

April 1, 2010 at 11:20 PM  
Blogger Mr. Thompson and Me said...

I think that you may be my favorite new blog to follow. Stopped from Friday Follow and so glad I did.

Hope you'll stop at www.mrthompsonandme.blogspot.com

April 18, 2010 at 10:05 PM  
Blogger  said...

Hubs doesn't really ask much anymore. I agree with the watching me have a child comment someone else made. Or maybe I've gained too much weight. Or maybe I'm too grouchy and he's not that interested. But we definitely need to have more sex. I'm just so scared to get preggo again!!!

May 10, 2010 at 11:22 AM  
Blogger Crystal said...

What's that....oh that's the sound of applause...me, applauding you! Great post...great point....great! Doesn't matter your religious belief...sex was meant to be enjoyed with your spouse. So why do we blush and think we can't talk about it? How do you think we got 4 kids? Yep- sex! Even when you don't want to...it's important to your hubby, to you, and to your marriage! GREAT JOB!

December 31, 2010 at 3:43 PM  
Blogger LindaFaye said...

I just wanted to let you know that I included this post on my "Great Links to Honest Sex Talk" :)

http://mamamiamcmasters.blogspot.com/2011/04/great-links-to-honest-sex-talk.html

April 4, 2011 at 7:56 PM  

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