< Things I Can't Say: All Touched Out

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Friday, November 20, 2009

All Touched Out

Don't get me wrong.

I love my little boys.

And I love their hugs, cuddles, snuggles, and whatever other term you want to use for affection.

But, occasionally...

I get all touched out.

Where I want to scream, "Don't touch me!!!!"

"Leave Mommy alone!"

*I've never actually screamed this, except for in my head.

And have no small child hanging on me, demanding to be held or carried.

That sounds so mean.

But, when Hubs is working, particularly when he is working late for several days in a row and the parenting all falls to me, my preschoolers and baby seem like cling-ons.

And then when Hubs finally gets home, he can FORGET ABOUT any sort of affection.

These moments as a mom who doesn't want to be touched...

They pass.

The guilt doesn't- it seems like one of those things that I shouldn't ever feel, as a mom.

Just bein' honest here.

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Blogger Caroline said...

I think it's totally normal for any human being to want some space, and it is okay. Even Jesus Christ himself needed to be alone sometimes. When this happens to me, it usually means I need some extra help from my husband.

Enjoying your blog! I just became a follower!

November 20, 2009 at 7:34 AM  
Blogger Emma said...

I think it's a normal reaction. Having three little boys sounds hectic in itself, not to mention having them cling to you all the time. But hey, at least you know they love you! :)

November 20, 2009 at 9:20 AM  
Blogger Evonne said...

It's great to know that our kids love us, but believe me, I have my "do not touch me" moments as well!

November 20, 2009 at 9:50 AM  
Blogger Mommy Lisa said...

OMG. Been there.

November 20, 2009 at 12:04 PM  
Blogger adrienzgirl said...

I totally have don't touch me moments. I have don't even effin look at me moments!

November 20, 2009 at 12:18 PM  
Blogger Chief said...

I am so relieved to find someone else has the same feelings. Most of my moments are "don't touch me"

November 20, 2009 at 12:46 PM  
Blogger Foursons said...

I am in that same position ALL THE TIME. Sometimes enough is enough.

November 20, 2009 at 12:53 PM  
Blogger Shell said...

Ahhhh, I love when I confess something that I feel bad about and then find out that it's normal. Love you ladies!

November 20, 2009 at 1:05 PM  
Blogger Lisa said...

You are not by yourself! I still have those moments and mine are grown.

November 20, 2009 at 6:38 PM  
Blogger Michele said...

Just because you are a mother doesn't mean you are no longer a human being with human needs, such as needing personal space from time to time. I don't think anyone would think you don't love/care about your kids just because sometimes you'd like time without them hanging on you. When my husband is out of town during the week my youngest likes to sleep with me; before her, my other children wanted to sleep with me. I know someday there will be no child who wants to snuggle with me at night...but, sometimes, I just want to sleep without a child snuggling up next to me, to have a night to myself. When I tell them I need to sleep by myself because I'm not feeling well (well, technically, I'm not--I'm feeling anti-social) I feel a little guilty when I see a sad look...but, really, I need that time to regroup so I can be a better mother later. I completely understand where you are coming from.

November 20, 2009 at 7:41 PM  
Blogger Jen said...

I so know what you mean. I think this almost daily. Its like, I just want my personal space respected. But kids, sadly, don't get it.

I feel guilty too. But what's a Mom to do?

Stopped by from SITS!

November 20, 2009 at 7:58 PM  
Blogger Carrie said...

Thanks for stopping by my blog! I'm glad I found yours!

I felt the same way the entire time I was pregnant with my first born. My poor dog would try to snuggle and I wanted NOTHING to do with her. It was heartbreaking for both of us! Now that I'm pregnant again, I haven't hit this stage yet but my 16 month old's incessant need to push me over when I'm sitting on the floor is getting a bit old. I'm sure it will continue to get more annoying the more pregnant I get!

That being said, by 6:00 each night I want to just sit and read email or drink hot chocolate. I feel like I'm "done" being mommy for the day! When we hear the garage door open as my husband comes home, both my daughter and I get huge smiles and run to the door!

November 20, 2009 at 10:54 PM  
Blogger kys said...

I have def. been there - especially when my boys were smaller. The last thing I wanted was another male clutching at me!

November 24, 2009 at 11:31 PM  
Blogger Amy said...

I feel this way sometimes too. I really used to feel this way when I was nursing Kaitlynn.

January 11, 2010 at 2:19 AM  
Blogger Kmama said...

I must not have been following you yet when you posted this. I was so there this weekend. After having a sick guy lay on me for all waking hours, I didn't want anyone to touch me.

However, I think these feelings are normal, so I don't carry a lot of guilt about them (and if they aren't normal, well, a whole lotta guilt just found me!).

January 11, 2010 at 10:23 AM  
Blogger Sunday said...

I totally get what you are saying (or rather not saying, except in your head)
Sad to say...I say that a lot to my boys. Because usually if they are touching me its with their feet...forcefully.

January 11, 2010 at 2:19 PM  
Blogger Chelle said...

Found you through Midday Escapades...and I love your blog already.

Totally get the "don't touch me" thing...I think to me it's always after a day of screaming, crying, hitting, no napping that gets me.

And to be honest? It's not always those kinds of days...I just need a minute of my own space.

<3 your blog...I am now your newest follower!

January 11, 2010 at 9:48 PM  

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