Shush, Mama Big-Mouth
A friend of mine just had a baby...or rather, his wife did. And what do I want to do? Exactly what annoyed me when I had my first baby: give tons of advice. I'm blaming it on the fact that I think a guy would appreciate tips on how to best deal with a newborn and that I would never say these things to a woman.
Things like how to do a really good swaddle wrap, what to do when breastfeeding makes your nipples feel like glass is being sucked out of your skin, what a lifesaver a swing can be, and how it's okay to be an emotional disaster shortly after giving birth.
I never wanted to hear any of those things from anyone, though. I wanted to figure it out on my own. I also think that other people's advice is tainted by their bad memories- they don't REALLY remember what it was like to have a newborn; they've romanticized their memories, saying some nonsense about their child sleeping thru the night at 3 days old- it's not true, it's just that they don't really remember what it was like.
My advice? Oh, it's not subject to a poor memory. Everyone else's is, but mine is perfect...or at least, I must think so, to open my mouth and spew out all the knowledge that I've gained from baby bunching.
Really, I wouldn't be surprised if his wife wanted to punch him in the nose for making a suggestion to her about what to do with the baby and prefacing it with "Shell says..." or maybe she'll just want to punch me instead...maybe I better put off my visit until I can learn to keep my mouth shut. Then again, I'd like to see him before he goes off to college.
Things like how to do a really good swaddle wrap, what to do when breastfeeding makes your nipples feel like glass is being sucked out of your skin, what a lifesaver a swing can be, and how it's okay to be an emotional disaster shortly after giving birth.
I never wanted to hear any of those things from anyone, though. I wanted to figure it out on my own. I also think that other people's advice is tainted by their bad memories- they don't REALLY remember what it was like to have a newborn; they've romanticized their memories, saying some nonsense about their child sleeping thru the night at 3 days old- it's not true, it's just that they don't really remember what it was like.
My advice? Oh, it's not subject to a poor memory. Everyone else's is, but mine is perfect...or at least, I must think so, to open my mouth and spew out all the knowledge that I've gained from baby bunching.
Really, I wouldn't be surprised if his wife wanted to punch him in the nose for making a suggestion to her about what to do with the baby and prefacing it with "Shell says..." or maybe she'll just want to punch me instead...maybe I better put off my visit until I can learn to keep my mouth shut. Then again, I'd like to see him before he goes off to college.
posted by Shell at
1:33 PM
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