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Monday, June 7, 2010

What I Learned

Once again, "wisdom" from my 21 year-old self, courtesy of my college journal. This particular entry was written the day after my college graduation.

I'm actually dedicating this post isn't that kind of cheesy? oh, well, I'm still doing it to Brittany Ciara at Not Your Average Teen who is graduating high school today. She had asked for letters to be sent to her to open after she graduates. Words of wisdom.

I'm a total slacker and never sent her anything. Besides, I thought that any advice that I'd give would make me sound like a crabby old lady and would be something that would have made a teenaged me roll my eyes. But, I thought this was appropriate.

So, Brittany, this is what I wish I could have done differently in college, right after it was over.  I hope you can read it and learn from my mistakes.

For the rest of you...well, you get another peek into my world from back then...


If  had college to do all over again:

-I'd be less afraid.

-I'd be more involved.

-I'd study less.

-I wouldn't procrastinate.

-I'd realize that grades aren't that important.

-I'd fall in love more and be heartbroken less.

-I'd be easier on myself.

-I'd have learned earlier that nothing is really as big of a deal as I think it is.

Attitude is what I'd change. Sure, there were events that happened that never should have happened Or ones that I wish would have happened, but really, the events of it make up who I am and shape my attitude.

I wish that had been reversed. Instead of the events shaping my attitude, I wish that my attitude could have shaped the events.



Blogger Katina said...

WOW! I really needed to hear this! Oh how our attitude can change things! That is so powerful. Thanks! You are so wonderful!

June 7, 2010 at 7:09 AM  
Blogger Oka said...

All great advice.

June 7, 2010 at 7:20 AM  
Blogger Rebecca said...

Just read a bit on that young lady's blog and she is amazing...what a strong young woman. I wish her all the luck in the world and may she take your advice to heart.

June 7, 2010 at 7:39 AM  
Blogger Sugar Bear said...

I still have a hard time with allowing things to change me rather then allowing myself to deflect all that stuff. Some great advice I think.

June 7, 2010 at 7:52 AM  
Blogger Cheryl said...

What a great list and such powerful words to share with someone just beginning her journey.

June 7, 2010 at 8:10 AM  
Blogger Secret Mom Thoughts said...

Funny how everything seemed so important in college like all the heartbrokeness but now seems silly. But you are right those events do shape us.

June 7, 2010 at 8:22 AM  
Blogger Joey Lynn Resciniti said...

Sometimes I think I should have studied less (especially in high school) and had more fun. But then I wouldn't be me. I think we just do the best we can in any situation.

June 7, 2010 at 8:24 AM  
Blogger As Cape Cod Turns said...

Attitude is everything. I think you need to experience some "events" to really realize that though. How great that you wrote this list after you graduated (and found it!).

June 7, 2010 at 8:30 AM  
Blogger Trish said...

wonderful advice is always better given once lived!

June 7, 2010 at 8:33 AM  
Anonymous Anonymous said...

That is really good advice!

June 7, 2010 at 8:36 AM  
Blogger Katie's Dailies said...

I think college is important to everyone who goes. It seems like the real jumping off point to being a grown up. My mind seemed to expand during those 4 years more than at any other time of my life.

Good words for a good person from a good person!

June 7, 2010 at 8:46 AM  
Blogger Evonne said...

Great advice!

So many times I wonder how things would be if I knew then what I know now.

June 7, 2010 at 9:02 AM  
Blogger Hair Bows & Guitar Picks said...

Some really good advice there :)

June 7, 2010 at 9:27 AM  
Blogger Jenn said...

Very good advice! Wish I had this post to read a few years back ...

June 7, 2010 at 9:41 AM  
Blogger T.J. said...

great list- I'm still working on trying to realize that nothing is as big a deal as I make it out to be.

June 7, 2010 at 9:57 AM  
Blogger JennRawks said...

good words. be less scared--that one in itself says it all...i was so scared i didn't go! i finally did after ....1.5 years but to my rinky dink home town one!
i totally would of went away!!

good stuff.

June 7, 2010 at 9:59 AM  
Blogger One Photo said...

Great post Shell and a great list for anyone about to start college. I sometimes remember back to my University days and wish I had had the confidence to just get out there and take full advantage of the life lessons to be learnt and non-academic opportunities. When we are young we have so much but a little more self believe and wisdom would make those times even better than they were.

June 7, 2010 at 10:00 AM  
Blogger Sara said...

This is great advice!! I *still* think things are too big of a deal. Which is probably why I'm so tired. This was a great post though!!!!

June 7, 2010 at 10:05 AM  
Blogger Sara said...

I think being less afraid would be on almost everyone's list.

Just imagine how different college wouldn't been if EVERYONE had been less afraid.

June 7, 2010 at 11:17 AM  
Blogger Mom vs. the boys said...

less afraid is a good one!
I love your list, I wouldn't even know where to start

June 7, 2010 at 11:59 AM  
Blogger Jenny said...

I really wish I would have let go more too and really enjoyed the experience!

June 7, 2010 at 12:04 PM  
Anonymous Anonymous said...

All wonderful advice!

June 7, 2010 at 12:24 PM  
Blogger Lourie said...

Good advice, and you made the right call in giving her that journal entry. Because it makes you more relate-able.

June 7, 2010 at 12:38 PM  
Blogger Sara said...

Very good advice!

June 7, 2010 at 12:48 PM  
Blogger Michelle @Flying Giggles said...

I wish I kept a journal during those years. It would be interesting to see what I thought.

You are right, the attitude should come first, it can really shape our life!

June 7, 2010 at 12:52 PM  
Anonymous Anonymous said...

Oh man! So agree with those! I especially like the- things aren't as big a deal as you make them out to be. I was totally like that and still am sometimes. Love that you share these journal entries!

June 7, 2010 at 12:55 PM  
Blogger RN Mama said...

This is all great advice. The only one I can't agree with is "study less," I don't think it would have been possible for me to study any less than I did! Ha:)

June 7, 2010 at 1:01 PM  
Blogger Daisygirl said...

honestly some of the best advice I have ever read!

I over study right now I know I don't need too but I do.

June 7, 2010 at 1:41 PM  
Blogger Nancy C said...

We can all be easier on ourselves. So, so true.

June 7, 2010 at 1:51 PM  
Blogger Unknown said...

Wow, your last words were really powerful and something I wish I would have been too. Thank you for sharing your journals

June 7, 2010 at 2:12 PM  
Blogger Joann Mannix said...

Hi Shell! I'm baaaack!

I have missed you all so much! Thank you again, for your kind words. They uplifted me on a day when I needed them the most.

I love your last line. I think it speaks to everyone at every moment of your life. It's what you make of it that dictates what will happen in your life.

I think for me, being less afraid was a huge one. My lack of confidence crippled me in those days in so many ways.

I am going to show this post to my daughter. She overstudies and gets so stressed and insists on straight A's for herself. I'm the one always telling her that it isn't essential to have perfect scores. I love how you defined that.

June 7, 2010 at 2:13 PM  
Blogger Trooper Thorn said...

Hmm. I would have actually gone to class and studied if I had it to do again. But I know I probably wouldn't.

June 7, 2010 at 2:33 PM  
Blogger Mass Hole Mommy said...

Don't we all wish we could do stuff differently?

June 7, 2010 at 3:12 PM  
Blogger Lisa said...

Great advice!
What we would change if we knew then what we know now.

June 7, 2010 at 3:59 PM  
Blogger Masala Chica said...

I wish I had been less insecure and less afraid to be myself a little more. life would have been way more fun. but hindsight is 20/20.

June 7, 2010 at 4:00 PM  
Anonymous Anonymous said...

I always thought I was lazy b/c I didn't study enough and B's and C's were good enough... but after college realized that it truly didn't really matter! Who looks at your grades???

June 7, 2010 at 4:29 PM  
Blogger Unknown said...

this is an incredible list and I'd have likely made a very similar one myself...

how is the hubs? what's the latest? keeping you guys in my thoughts & prayers.

June 7, 2010 at 4:53 PM  
Anonymous Anonymous said...

yea we all have to learn those the hard way, don't we? I'd like to go back in time and tell my college self that hot water bottles are excellent things. (I was often cold!!)

June 7, 2010 at 4:56 PM  
Blogger Michelle Pixie said...

Oh Shell, this is beautiful and made me cry! It is so true and I wish someone had given me that advice 15 years ago!

June 7, 2010 at 5:48 PM  
Anonymous Anonymous said...

I LOVE this list! What an awesome treasure to have!

June 7, 2010 at 5:49 PM  
Blogger The Random Blogette said...

Love it! I wish I would've had that advice in college!

June 7, 2010 at 5:50 PM  
Blogger Kmama said...

That's a great post for Brittany!! Wisdom at 21.

June 7, 2010 at 8:22 PM  
Blogger Liz Mays said...

Attitude can make all the difference in the world!

June 7, 2010 at 9:12 PM  
Anonymous Anonymous said...

I like this post and wish I, too, let my attitude lead.

June 7, 2010 at 9:13 PM  
Blogger Sara @ Domestically Challenged said...

I wish I was 22 again a few times...with what I know now. wouldn't things be different!? Great advice

June 7, 2010 at 10:15 PM  
Blogger The Drama Mama said...

Wow, that was powerful!! I 100% agree with you. A positive attitude will get you everything.

June 7, 2010 at 10:45 PM  
Blogger Tammy said...

Oh, there are so many do overs I wish I could do. Hindsight it 20/20! Great post girl!

June 7, 2010 at 10:55 PM  
Blogger Alexis AKA MOM said...

Oh girlie I so wish I wrote down things like that to myself! You were very insightful my dear :)

June 7, 2010 at 11:15 PM  
Blogger Dalia (Generation X Mom) said...

I so wish I could do it all again. I think the age when we have to make all these decisions is just too young, who really knows what we truly want at that age.

June 7, 2010 at 11:24 PM  
Blogger Babes Mami said...

Great wisdom for her!

June 7, 2010 at 11:47 PM  
Blogger Holly Lefevre said...

What a great idea she had...to gather advice from all over blog land! I think being less afraid would be my number one pick.

June 8, 2010 at 1:42 AM  
Blogger Laurel said...

"I'd fall in love more and be heartbroken less."

I LOVE this!

June 9, 2010 at 1:06 AM  

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